It’s morning. I woke up. It’s hatefully grey.
I’d close my eyes and go back to sleep.
Thoughts wander around me like chimeras
And weave their nets from all sides of me.

I think I’ll make one of them just a reality:
I’ll make some coffee, there’s no other way.
The day won’t work out without coffee.
And there’ll be a mess in my head anyway.

I’m up. What a nebulous nasty morning.
It shamelessly drives me crazy at all.
And why did I suddenly feel wholly
That I know all about myself?
What a fool?

What a phenomenal wacky silliness!
What a criminal irrational nonsense!
I thought that tomorrow is really fatal
As it was in the same way for years.

And what is in point of fact?
Where’s tomorrow?
All colors around me are totally dim.
I try to find my previous strong energy,
But only monotony is all-around me.

It was so simple yesterday, but now it’s ugly.
My coffee’s sneezing. It’s got a cold.
Well, I’ll go to live just like that, don’t look behind.
And I will live as long as I can, with no support.

I stand in front of you, stunt, sickly.
My eyes are rayless, my skin is weakly.
No sign of joy or peg to life.
I'm tangled in whole in a net of lies.

I don't cry, but tears are all around.
It's like a life circle for me is shut down.
I don't scream - no strength, no strife.
It's like a mouse has gnawed of all my life.

I stand in front of you, disheveled.
I'm like a book, thumbed through, bedevilled.
And there's no use or purpose in it.
Her place is on the far shelf indeed.

I stand in front of you as I am right now.
Don't drive me away from you, put up with somehow.
I've no strength, no faith, no meaning, no purpose.
Leave me a pinch of love at least, with no pose.

I didn't leave fast.
I walked a millimeter at a time.
I left you not at once.
I waited. I didn't move. I paused in my rhyme.

I vanished in drops.
I took myself from you little by little.
I didn't even notice that
I pulled away from you in whole, up to tittle.

I am ashamed to live today!
There’s too much malodorous mud!
I want to create, to win, to love!
But how’s it possible?
The evil’s crowned!

I look out the window and see the sky.
I go out the yard and hear the groan.
It’s up in the air, ashamedly, clumsy.
It understands that the final is known.

I am ashamed for this crippled truth.
The fact, that seemed like a nonsense yesterday,
Is now a reality where we have to be.
I don't want to live here!
Just noway!
Noway!