These bridges you have thus built and those you keep on building are the ones we can always cross from which pebbles we can toss and watch their ripples downstream crossing over into our once upon dream
I tell truth couched in lines of metaphor and marvel when you're unable to decipher it. I riddle my feelings at you in digital media under assumed names and lament how you can't see how I feel. I pretend at such depth but swim so close to the surface I can hear sing-song sounds gurgling in my ears and still feel the warmth of sunshine on my neck. I move with eyes open in shallow water but pinch my nose closed against the current to prevent it from invading me with the honesty that will break me completely in two. I look at you through this distorted mess and apply new paint to the same tired ******* wreck. I sink when I try to float even when I hold my breath but I lie about it about everything if that isn't too much to tell. Did you believe me when I said I was beside you during those laps? I was waiting in the shallows crouched to seem in much deeper than I am and hoping that you would pretend you couldn't see through me for a while. If I closed my eyes and fell backward on the surface of the lake would you agree that I'd floated or would you tell the truth for my sake?
Cousin Mike more than a brother over years. You had *** at 14. I kissed them made them cry. Wyoming was roaming with eager wet tears. You broke our hearts and used ***** to die.
Continuum Reality never added up Walking a tightrope Underneath the layers piled up Pulling the covers Over my head nonstop As life was Viciously attacking me from all sides Frozen being This world passed me by Like a train wreck Waiting to happen Beggar You slowly sunk your Teeth into my soul Life hasn’t always Painted thee prettiest of pictures The pain on My hands was not Of my design Buried In the trenches Life murdered My dreams one by one What was left after that Made each breath That much harder to find Seeing thee things I did Only flawed me that much more Why did it have to be me Always caught in the crossfire A passer by I was Living life through a fractured lens Like a kaleidoscope Where dreams came to die Life was never easy on the eyes Pleasant Far from anything I would have come up with on my own If only there was a better story to tell Believe you me I would have Certainly done so beforehand
Covered in dirt Crossing over a bridge Awaiting a Eulogy Like a faint whisper Grab a loudspeaker Somethings are Better left unsaid If you want my truths Pick up my journals And read my poetry Because there ain’t nothing Hiding there I hold back nothing I kept a lot To myself for good reason I’ve always been good At stuffing my suitcase To thee brim And throwing it in the closet Jamming everything down Numbing myself to the core It’s hard being sober If people knew how I truly Felt deep inside They’d probably run the other direction And hate me like I’ve Always hated myself I put my mask on when I have to Pretend I’m doing okay Play there stupid games When I’d rather just drift off Into that dark corner off the room Me myself and I And the voices in my head That I’ve dreaded all my life Words best not spoken…