I lived (unconsciously) to die.
Reckless behavior, bending the rules.
I wanted to **** the butterflies he had given me,
drown them in ***** and whisky.
I tried riding in cars with unknown boys to fill the deep void.
I lost count of the beds I  woke up in,
I lost count of the nights I cried myself to sleep
I hated the loneliness in the morning after having someone next to me.

Live fast and die young.
Excess was not enough.
I wanted everything faster, higher, stronger.
More music, more "friends", more shots, more kisses
More....
               More...
                             More..
I didn´t realize I was slipping through my own hands.
Less time,  less life, less love, less of me.
Less...
           Less...
                      Less...
I kept pushing the buttons of whatever god that was keeping me safe
and I let my demons become the owners of who I usted to be.

I thought I was living the life,
but I was already dead inside.

you draw a straight line down my spine
barely touching
but i can feel
your soul spilling out of your fingertips.
the taste of your salty sweat on my tongue as I leave my purple print in a place only for you to see.

Near light improvised music
Under a moon so gray
Tomorrow's song
Sings of an evening
Pocketed in the dark
Absorbing us
Breathing us
Feeling us
Pulling us away
And we but following
Our usual routine
Lose track and thought
Of our words and hearts
Lose track and thought
Of our sight and light
Lose track and thought
Of our love,
And we simply
Reminisce.

the air is suffocating
and all that I want
i cannot have because
the fear is too tall

as my heart sways
on a thin thread
don't let me have
one more fall

there are no more
moonlit nights
all that is left is
ashes on the wall

just stay beside me
speak no more because
with my final breath
**i give you my all