talking in the dark
speaking only with our hands
I found warmth and light

of GRAVITATION —
I want you near just as much
as you want me close

they say it's all in
my head — why do I feel it
in my LIMBS and CHEST

sarcasm demands
shared intimate history
for it to make sense

I thought I needed
you — for me to be happy —
turns out I only
needed you to be happy —
no matter where that leaves me

I have yet
to understand
what it's like
to have
had touched
and tasted fire —
raging

to have
had melted
from a warmth
given off
by a source
other than
my own

and to have
been molded
into the image
and likeness
of a space
I didn't
create

I have yet
to gain
the CONFIDENCE
to cast fire
that comes with
having had
tasted you

when people feel trapped
sometimes they're the prisoner
sometimes they're the cell

I saw you walk in—
to this place like an ocean
wave — reclaiming land
                                            (I'm the land)

slow mornings are for
taking his time to hold me
like a lazy cat

it will all make sense
you can't tell that to someone
who is hurting NOW‎

no one told me that
aching for someone, for love
would be this painful

this feels like a long
ride where everyone got off —
and then it's just me

made of soft mornings
humid noons, quiet evenings —
I dream of summer

stop me — stop what we're
doing just so I can get
on my knees to plead
                                      (don't)

you came to take your
stuff — you can take everything
just take me with you

sleep came with a dream
heard a kid's laughter — wondered
was it mine, or my

take me by the hand —
that is how I'll know for sure
that I still exist

right hand seeks the lamp
left arm — numb with you in it
I wake up alone

as long as the sea
ends up on top of me — claimed
inevitably

having a blacksmith
for a father always set
the house on fire — some
children get tempered like steel —
some get brittle like charcoal

I keep wanting you
and aching afterward — yet
I keep
            coming
                           back

no fortune teller
could tell how fortunate I
am to have you near

dough in the oven
and a lover with their past
— these things won't rise if
you keep opening it up
digging it, calling them out

I hear rain coming
like heavy footfalls of my
favorite person

the PARABLE of
the ALL-NIGHTER: "is sleep just . . ."

a SOCIAL CONSTRUCT

you make sense — like a
warm mug of matcha latte
on a rainy day
                      門

words scatter like wind
and hover above my head
in a nameless cloud

can't tell if it's the
cold air — or disengagement
that makes mornings hard

it started with his
voice — deep — then it was his eyes
when he smiled — honest

how many mails left
on 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚍 are too many — to
consider stoping?

I was up, thinking
were you ever woken by
                    rain, at 2 am?
then I wished I was there to
feel your arms wrapped around me

you know you've got it
bad when you check your watch and
what was 10 is 2

even my own eyes
deny me of my own tears
— what else can't I have

this crowded room is
a battlefield where we take
turns stealing glances

the earth was a wide
and blank canvas — now you're my
FAVORITE COLOR

can life lose all its
meaning — and could there ever
be one without love?

bamboos sway and bend
in the moon's last summer light
we say our goodbyes
                                  門
                            ­      さ
                                  よ
                     ­             う
                                  な
              ­                    ら

microgravity
behold, this astronaut's set
to find V⊙YAGER

seated, my back rests
but calm deserted me when
you pressed my shoulders

when my palm is on
the side of my face
and my fingers curl
at the back of my neck
I can't tell
which
feels which

peal my layers off
eat me up and spit me out
plant me — I'm a seed

muffle every groan
and moan,
                     and whimper,
                                                 and sigh
with your mouth on mine

thank the gods we're in
a crowded room — I would've
confessed* where I stood

(*or came out)

silence, your silence
is not a void — it is a
warmth I come home to

they say looks can ****
but why does mine want you stripped
warm — and on my bed

you, who keep singing
a song after leaving the
room — coming back and
picking up where you left off —
like you never even left

I take this ring, a
sign of my folly — so I
can pretend I'm yours

heaven's gate closes
the longer I keep you here
sunkissed, on my bed