Getting old
Upcoming change
What smoking does to my health
That my grandson took a ****
When his mom will be home in two minutes

I must remind myself
Lack of resistance
Is not encouragement
In fact
Lack of encouragement
Is resistance

The thing about you
I wish I knew
Are you content
Or are you intimidated
By your own sense of worth
Value
Which can never be properly viewed
By you

Blame doesn’t have to be claimed or assigned
It lies in every adult
You or me
Blame is there
Surely for this or for that
Some carry more
Or less  
Some pretend they carry none
Some really believe it
But no body
Is blameless

I'll write another poem for you
Really, that's all I can do
You are far, too far away
And that is where you're gonna stay
Maybe we will meet someday
If things go perfectly my way
But until that day
I'll still have my say
Though you won't hear it, anyway

Shall I write you poetry?
What is it you need to see
That would make you want to know me?

Wat of if I loose my mind?
Sometimes?
Is that ok with u?
Can I be tru?  
My ugly too see
Numerously
When u look at me
Must be

Let me bring you there
A new space in your mind
You’ve maybe been before
Without that shade of hue
Each time you go there
It still seems so new

Maybe it’s not so grim
As it seems to you
But being the one
With bad luck
Is really hard to do
******* body
******* mind
Wondering what you did
To deserve this ****** time.

The one friend
Who makes me wish I could be gay
She’d be a perfect lover
If I could just get down that way

Too hott off the press
The girl is a mess
Yet
Very selective
In whom she will
Bless
With her
Disorganized
Chaotic
Beautiful mess
That man is worthy of nothing less

My wish is to bring about a
Poetry Revolution
Where the fight is brought
To the eternal battle
Knowledge over ignorance
Poets have the particular task
Of polishing off
Ignorance hiding as knowledge
In the perpetual
Poetry Revolution
Maybe my wish has already come true
Poets are the type to sneak up on you
Then speak up on you
There is yet to be a defense
Through time
From a burn in a poetry line

Breath
A thousand times a day
Taken for granted
Thank you
Breath
Fill me up
With life
Big breath
Calm
Sometimes breath is all we count on
That is enough
In the rough

I watched you lose him
It took all of a second
A flash of a smile
Dimpled and sweet
He took to it
Like a dog to meat
It’s a good thing
Dogs are so otherwise
Adorable
And give such special treats

Too beautiful to look at
To stay so mesmerizing
Seeing doesn’t work that way
But getting used
To looking at you
Takes longer than anyone else
I ever knew

What could it be
Slowly, slowly
Too slow
Maybe
Who knows
How it’s s’posed to be?
Not you
And definitely
Not me
Maybe we

Letting go
Processed slow
Ain’t nothing else I got to show
You’ve already seen
You know what you know
Acceptance
Processed slow
Letting go

Can’t figure why you stay away
I tell myself you won’t want to someday
You could come
Or you could go
Please do something to make it so
Whichever way the stream will flow
We still gonna get there slow
But I need to know which way to go
Set me on my journey to find a home
And if it ain’t with you
Tell me to roam

There’s a spiderweb outside
In between two trees
Maybe four feet wide
Hott ****
That spider ain’t no chump
How did it make that
Incredible jump?

Friday night I crashed your party
Saturday, I said I’m sorry
Sunday came and trashed me out again
I was only having fun
Wasn’t hurting anyone
And we all enjoyed the weekend, for a change
I’ve been stranded in the Combat Zone
I walked through Bedford Stuy alone
Even rode my motorcycle in the rain
And you told me not to drive
But I made it home alive
So you said that only proves that I’m insane
You may be right
I may be crazy
But it just may be a lunatic you’re looking for
Turn out the light
Don’t try to save me
You may be wrong, for all I know
But you may be right

Something will come
Maybe
A new string of words
I didn’t already say
A genius thing
That brings you towards my way
And I come back
All the time
Trying to get to that day
Even if it takes till never
Apparently

It’s hard to be a grownup
With adult sensibilities
Thinking over the stupid crap
I did when I was a kiddie
There ain’t no going back
To when I was thirteen
And stopping myself from torturing
That poor girl I bullied
I can’t replace
The money
I stole from nana’s purse
When I was a teen
All I can do
Is not repeat
Those stupid mistakes
That may define me

He threatens with his absence
Torturous for you
When he's gone
You muddle on
Barely getting through
You obsess and cry all day
His insensitive social media page
Goes on, happily, alone
Leaving you to atone
Because you've committed some
Unknowable sin
Or maybe failed to worship him
You're begging now
To be let back in
So you can start it all over again

My daughter is so much more
Beautiful than me
And she looks like her father
Poetic
In it’s way
For me to be able to say

I see your potential
Your feelings are raw
Spilling out unrefined
But relatable and true
I get the feeling you’ve been searching for
An identify
But before you find that
You need to set your poet free
Through editing
No matter how illogical
That be

It is alarming to see
How many unlocked doors
Are cloaked with invisibility

I wanna be angry
And stomp my feet
Run into the street
And scream like a banshee
I wanna curse
Wish you the worst
Pray for you to feel the thirst
I wanna bring down the boom
Cast a spell so you see me in every moon
I wanna bring myself to you
Then turn and show you my back
I want you to yearn for me
As if I’m all you lack
I want to fill your senses
Till you cannot go without
You can be the teapot
And I will be the spout
I want to be the song
You whistle as you go along
And all who hear it pause
To hear the Pied Piper
And her cause
I want to be the horses and the men
Who put Humpty Dumpty together again
I want to be the plate you lick clean
Or even lick *****
You know what I mean
I want to be the mosquito
Piercing your skin
I want to be the air you’re breathing in
I want to sin and sin and sin
But we both know I ain’t getting in
Meanwhile you sit under my skin

It’s not easy to let go of you
A piece of my soul
Is going, too

Those who have been conned
Will never admit
That’s how it be
And will really believe
The fool is me
And who knows
Maybe that is
The way it be

It wasn't a poem that came out
Random words that sounded
Sort of philosophical
Without knowing their meaning
Like existential
Which sounds intelligential
If you're not guessing
At the definition
But the work was liked
And loved and egos rubbed
And we've created a
Monstersaurus
Just once, I'd like to see her write
Without employing her
Thesaurus

Poetry
For me
Is loving words and their fluidity
I can say the same thing
In ten different ways
Make up new words
Go into a craze
As long as it’s something
Others might feel
Those beloved words become real

Maybe I didn’t try hard enough
But we both know that’s not true
I suppose I could have tried longer
If I was stronger
But I am a spineless shrew
I can blame it on my invisibility
But I know you could hear me speak
I’ve got no excuse
And you’ve got plenty
But frankly, sir
It would have been easy
For you to just tell me to leave
It wasn’t your responsibility
We both know that to be true
But when you’re pretending
To be unaware
There’s no such thing as
True and fair

Did you see that?
I almost put my foot down
And then picked it right up off the ground
No wonder you avoid me
I’m dancing like crazy
Foot up, foot down,
Foot on up again
Repeat ceaselessly til who knows when
It’s impossible to stand
Stuck doing the kookie dance
Compulsion happenstance
Or maybe ants in the pants
Woefully lacking in I can’ts

I could make promises to myself I don’t mean
Try to make a break that’s clean
Swear to every deity
Take an aching knee
I wish I could believe
If only so I could pray
For you to notice me
Vibrantly

He sat back
And watched me burn
In his front row spot
All the time
Sipping his wine
Ignoring all the hot
The flames were so persistent
Consuming much my spirit
And though I screamed real loud
He pretended not to hear it
One day I will get my turn
With the one who will not let me burn

To keep the peace
I let you have a piece
And you kept that, too
It wasn’t worth the argument
To proclaim it didn’t really belong to you
For all your posturing delusions
I’m pretty sure you knew it, too

Simple and ignorant
Are nothing alike
Simple is genius in disguise
Ignorant is
Dummy on display

I will stay in the back of your mind
I will stay there for years
Perhaps your whole life
And though it’s not the place
I’d choose to be
Any spot is fine for me
It’s your mind
So in it, you are the boss of where I will be

Listen
You little **** (I’m sorry)
I’m obviously not getting over it!  
It may be a blessing
It may be a curse
You may be the best
You may be the worst
I am here with all this obvious thirst
And instead of sending me to the next saloon
Or opening the door and giving me room
You leave me out here howling at the moon
Foolish me, just can’t get over it
Chasing after you little **** (I’m sorry)

Bringing it to ya
Boo
Something you never before knew
Me
The one and only
Never been seen
In the entirety of history
Until
Me
A golden rarity
Piece that fits so perfectly
Maybe
You will never know
Unless you try to see

He’s there,
Somewhere
The one for me
It is certainly true
Whoever he be
Is gonna be a lot like you

I cannot answer your calls
You are no longer wild and crazy and fun
Now you are just wild and crazy
Looking for something to serve as a gun
So you can pretend you didn’t pull the
Trigger
They are all around
Triggers
And you pull every one
On all those imaginary guns
Slow suicide
Painfully slow
Sometimes I wish you’d just hurry up and go

I think of you
And what you may be going through
I think of you
And send my love
Though  I am not one of His followers
I am asking your God for help from above
It’s gotta be an extra special prayer
If I take myself to go there
Praying to your God
Do I even dare?
Yes, I do
Because I care about you
And I’d do anything
To help you get through
So I say “Dear God,”
And I say “Amen,” too

Dear sir
I think you have mistaken poetry
For an advertisement
To the club you belong to
In the form of a
Written lecture
Trying to pretend
It is poetry
But this poem is really in vain
Because if you read it
You will say
"I wonder who this 'poem' is talking about."
One of the most beautiful things about Poetry
Ambiguity
I can creatively
Tell someone to "*******"
And who knows how many people will think I'm talking about them?
Or tell someone they're wonderful
And make however many people
Feel wonderful
Others can relate
And find common ground
Dear sir,
I think you have mistaken poetry

How do you resist?
And why am I the only one feeling like this?  
The rumble in my soul
Inner magnet’s pull
Right down to my pit
Battery-less *******
Sitting on my ****
I don’t know what to do
With any of that ****
If you can’t feel it too
What’s a girl to do?
Focus on something new?  
It’s not the kind of thing I can force
But I’ve gotta fill it up somehow
Of course
Off course
For sure
Thorn and bramble
Quicksand, too
This ******* cursed course!  
Maybe it’s not something I can do
Tomorrow, and lots of tomorrows too
No end
Maybe
I suppose it all depends on me
How long does one walk to feel free?

It’s not a necessity
You and me
But it feels like
It really should be
Someday
Maybe
Hopefully

It hurts to be missing out on you
It hurts me that you’re missing out on me
Too
I did all I could do
I’m happy that it doesn’t hurt you
I wish for you
A new sun that’s blue
To bring joy and joy and joy to you

Outside
Alone
And the sounds
Sometimes just the wind
Peaceful
Even with birds
Fighting in background
Tom cats wailing
Tortured haunts of the quiet
Somehow
It’s still peaceful
Outside
Alone

I have no grief over what never was
Or what I wished to be
There surely is something wonderful
Still in store for me

Did you notice?
Probably not
You got right there
And couldn’t say it
I know you wanted to
I know why you couldn’t
It is not a shortcoming or a fault
To be a gentleman
A celebration of your positive
Qualities
Is in order
The world has got enough tough guys