she huddles in
tormented pose
working like a fiend
on her oeuvre’s
final piece
the anatomical agony
of horizontal necks
the three shades
the souls of the ******
abandon all hope ye who enter this mind
the words run
in the shadow of her face
years and years
the pyre’s ash
tormented her features
until her skin turned
grey like the sky
abandon all hope ye who enter
she lost her mind
somewhere in the fire
abandon all hope
on that day
she cried for the sun
abandon
she huddles in
her loose skin
the oils of her flesh
embodying the paints
staining the woman
she once was

my brain is a magnet
attracting itself to you
and my heart is a wrench
fixing the toilet
these incantations to raise
you up
these words to make you holy
have me on my knees
with the ****-mucked tiles
but I wouldn’t change
any of it
no
I’d do anything for you
my soul will split
at the rack before
I ever mutter a word
love
how dare I!
I thought I was better
I thought I could look
without touching
speak without breathing
feel without loving
disaster
fortuitous
storm of color
spray me red
splay me naked
for the world to see
my fingers are inspired
to write a friend
in history
in my heart
forever

it’s a kiss of
blowsy fate:

the yellow leaves
float and
hold the
moment of
brown-blue
crunch
under new
tennies—
cool

and the kiss
of an old
mattress flipped,

a pumpkin vine
twisted,

a musty basement
coated in
lavender mist—

the breadth
of nascence in
my mouth:
Ginger

I think was
her name

and the ash
of my cigarette
smokes
the blown
sidewalk.

Only the strongest dark lines
cut the vision of your
profile. Your visage—a blazing ball
of gas—atoms emitting light in
every version day.

I am born again
this September morning as
each thorn on the rosebush
breaks pink with the sun

the hummingbird buzzes by,
echoes and springs in
the mist of chamomile flower—
a yellow-bodied bloom and
liquid-sugar disco running over
conscious body,
conscious mind

a chord is struck and
pecks the roof twice—
tap…
tap…
and I see god for what she is—
suddenly and always present as
two birds dance their wings
over a cradle of planted flowers

I have a 6th sense for
broken people
when I look at them and say
thank you
I can feel what they
feel and it *******
hurts
maybe I’m just projecting
my own pain
but you were always
there to be my
whipping post and
I’m not putting you
through that ****
again
I’m sorry
these words
don’t mean
anything

You are bold
the inspiring queen
of Fs and
As
and I
a crafty lizard
this christmas mug
from which you drink
these scissors with
which I shred
words
our stories all
come together
on top
of a golden rose
24 carat
sampled with
my teeth
secured
in my bedroom
all of it
is yours
and
the last coin
evens
my luck

the wicked queen of morning
greets you with
clutching shore

little pebbles in the stream
rob red rubies
from dead fish bellies

on a rock
there are some feathers
a broken beak
crunched bones

your attention is cut
with the dead kiss
of a woodpecker

you are bound
to relive the death
of thousands of forests
bound to kiss
the stream’s mojo
laughter

listen—
the stream is still asleep
its floor is falling through
the weight of its slumber

nothing can contain it

I was not sick
and needed no

convalescence

no rebirth
or panning
view of

bloodscape

the black

gasp of dawn
it offered

never
drew

no sickness

no hospital
beds

or starched sheets

no goodbye
rain

or last shot
of whiskey

it unended

when the
sickness of

the mind
rolled in

with its fingers
shaped like a gun

and a trash bag
for my jewel

give me
no sickness

I begged

and robbers
there were three

beat me down and
left me like a

headless buck

spark the flask—the vitality
of natured *****
and

tears (they fall again)

releasing the bloodied heron from
sleep—

yesterday,

I drew a lead around you
and harnessed your heart
like a dog and (for the first time)
you

were on your own,
schmaltzy from

daddy’s liquor.

this

blindfolded euphoria
creeping in channel 99’s

static—how

I’d drink you whole
until my toes swelled up

rough and one-rooted

I pluck you a crocus
and all life becomes
a legend of the body

a torch-whipped storm
pastel in its fire
buries me in you

when I hand you the stem
a shake
and the yellow stamen

loses its dust

lady lady
forgets its bug
when I place the flower

in your vase

spots wiped black-less
insect no more
lady lady

the inspection of autumn
bulb-less growth
and a string of red

***** and betting its stripes

a tiny mound of dirt
obscured by rotting leaves

the last of you reaching for my hand

you follow me everywhere
little girl wet with tears
kissed and shut in the garage
with that yippy dog and
a box of fruit rollups
to rip and obsess
to **** at your heels
driven into the dirt
my popper princess
you've endured enough

cedar and gold
the kiss of flakes
little glaciers
melt in canoed-orbs
these footsteps tracking along
the era of winter
some birds
still sing
and I shake
in trepidation
I
little leaf
molding
peat and whiskey
keeps me warm
your cedar and gold
along a fire crackles
and I move in
the sweater
tight
the jean jacket
50’s boy
and laughter at
the weather
closer and
closer
still

my hand touches
yours

wild in wind

flesh and
insect

a plume of rapid
so pink and

gorgeous to the
biochemist

within my timbre

I sing your
praises to the moon

eighth note
yellow-tipped

flat-cupped
cord and

piano blooming

Words long as
The sea
You are above
Every
Articulate
Aspect

You look
light into my
dreams
a whole mind
under this
ocean-tango
the
exit sign
the scents
entwined
ascending
your head
my neck
the pulse of you
sticks
burns
of fire
us
a
twizzler
of spirit
entering
with
transparency

wings on barbed wire
wave me hello as the train
travels supernova
explosion through
downtown.

we have spoken words
that meant something,
that gripped iron ends
onto our ankles and kept
us close.

in shackles, we outshone
the entire galaxy.
in chains, we sped through
the world catching wind
of bleeding bird feet—the
sweet chips and chirps now
reverberate symphony
through thick plastic.

And I am on top
of you licking your pores
like charcoal.

God
what have I created?
such fire
and sin
spewing from my
pen
drawing blood
from all of these
prisoners
the devil
spilling out like
vapor
from the cracks
in my
door
such poison
am I
such a delicate
observer
of death

I’m sorry you have to see me like this
all stinky and bruised
love, these thoughts torture me like this pie
it’s made with red corn syrup
it reminds me of your blood
I see underneath your skin
to your almond eyes shimmering
to your beating heart somewhere in Colorado
lord, how I love you
lord, how life is a road trip through hell sometimes
how we end up in rooms with pink noise
but how?
how does love end in places where no one wants to go?
where no one lives
where pie taste like blood
and you are pale, grief-stricken
almost crying
I see how things are
I see how I am a man destined to eat the air you left behind
you, perfumed with thoughts of me and I beat because of it
you, tortured by my spirit
you, half my soul. don’t run away just yet
wait until I finish my pie and fall over, flushed.

You scrape my chin
to my profile—your teeth,
the source of gamma ray burst.
Everything massive,
collapsing. Events on the horizon
eating light, getting us out
of the boon. The small things
of us reduced to a
pinprick at the center—a singularity
of gas and cloud.

I imagine
myself being crushed and
strung backwards.

I find you
the lappet moth
like slug or bat
with fuzzy ears
stuck dead with
nothing except
the toxins of
my fever
abnormally
high and
boiling
how

perfect it is
to be under
your legs
bugs
or none
my fingers will
do the
crawling for
any insect
camouflaged
in the skin
dig

the nails
now
bits of flesh
under
tiny specks
of blood
gather
and your net
snags
words I’ve
never uttered

crew-cut,
winter’s rust,
my tongue smudged with coal,
snagged with the bug I rise,
crawl my stare across space to where you lie
perfect in ashes,
un-spread and boxed,
I plant a kiss on your screaming lily.

"some cry with tears,
others with thoughts"*

sun-way heat beats against
quiet bodies.

my truth left two souls
melding with a splash of
purple—

the mimicry of my cry
surging with
impending ocean.

you who I truly know
last kissed June 7th
in eternal sunshine—go
to beach

and be free.

I’ll wait for you in
the meantime.

meaning
I can hear you
anchor that holds us
down
a second
I lost you
complete
fire
pierced
meaning
I am light
a flotation of end
a memory of when I was
four
a rise and you
the nebula in which
I
speck
meaning
a fullness
an overflow
a mist of brown and
wave
the hand which I
have writ
the looseness of your
outline
meaning
all the sheets
smooth and cupped
the ribbons around
the slight chip
rainbow
meaning
the sketch
and you
a prayer
I
break

night is precious
prey and
predator.

night is
whisper and
auscultation
of worried men.

night is blonde
bone removed from
the body.

night is stiletto
killer elite.

night is
my brightest
friend.

night,

leave
and take your
bell with
you.

gnaw red your bone
in the aliform of dream
this

allocation of my
guts spreads lips
onto stained paint buckets
I

never meant for
us to be beautiful
adding

music
to every line
that came out
your mouth—

a moth-springing
butterfly
its

wings no longer
dusted but

dried and wasteful.

it was the
paradox of doubt
and

I cried through
painkiller night

moonlight caught the top of the lighthouse
bounced of its silver mirror
its beaded tears filled my bottle
and I drank until I couldn’t stand any longer
it’s okay, boy
said the man selling fruit at 1 am
and I embraced his dead shadow

there you stand
on the bridge above rio grande—
miles of rock hungry and unfulfilled,
the spring snow chasing your name
into my mouth,
the synth of sunrise tucked
behind moon-cut mountains.
I pull off on the side and see
this is how I will be without you,
my bright girl

my orchid now blooms
twelve to match
the bird pecking at
midnight

the yellow tongues
of blushed cheeks
become fans for
soft, white petals

inner honeycombs
turn red when
you say
(in perfect sobriety)
how beautiful I am

and for a moment
there are orchids blooming
in the diner

the muse of nature revels
in the cradle of a loved one’s whisper

the salsa of wind knifes off rock and
spreads melting sand into stained glass

a rainbow loops out the ears
and croons the rain into a gentle patter

the indefinite bruises the back of the throat
as half-notes are woven into air—

silence forever dreaming of music

I place my bet
on strings pulled

by the sun.
crows in their

black plumage
are silhouettes  

suspending
mustache sunset.

my pockets are
empty—

no lint,
crime

or cash.
I am broken

but will not run
into the darkness.

no
let me maunder

with the ephemera
of passing day.

I need a friend to
talk to.

the sun prowls around
its rocky master

and you
a shadow in its breath

your eyes closed
your hair blowing
like a brushfire
bleeding oolong

the brazen claps of
sunlight thunder
down upon your shoulders

a freckle appears

then another

then another

your sea of blank skin
now crushed
tiny islands
cooling you in
sun-drenched picture

the waiting of
knick knack paddy whack
the toxic
neurotransmitters
the corrosion
of my 7th branch
the thought of
the reality of
sometimes lonely
on a little
planet
every *****
thing
evaporated
water
you draw me
your hand
covered in
lyrics
a limerick of knuckles
a sometimes waiting
patiently
a sometimes never
to come

when you’re depressed you can get people
to mix you Arnold Palmers
or even
John Dalys
if you ask nicely
then you can get drunk
without anyone giving you ****
because all good depressed people
drown their grief with *****
and all good depressed people
die silently in doleful cloud
without drawing attention from
burping too loudly
or collapsing on a street corner
no
pain should be silent
with a tall glass of sweetened tea
a couple shots of *****
and a pencil writing furiously
the last thoughts
the last rights
the stencil of the moon
because all that will be left will be
a memory of you
standing naked in the mall screaming
I love you John Daly!!! Take me with you!!!
unfortunately
John Daly isn’t god
and he can’t zap
you from this earth
no matter how much you scream
you will always be a ghost on fire
drunk and afraid
wailing through the atmosphere
like a cat being held by its tail
you
the definition of good depressed people

you are my animal, and
I am your whip.
what exists between us
is only dust—a milky
center of blood
tessellating
with
heart cells.

I’d hide in your
briefcase and
be smuggled across
the boarder as
a cheese knife
if only you’d look
at me—your animal,
my whip sending
flakes of fresh flesh

midway
along
magnets…but

be careful.
once you catch
crack of my sting

there is no going back.

I wish I could find
Another
Word
One plucked from a
Chicken or
Snagged to a line
But all I have is
Drift
You
Laughing
Like a drunken
Gondolier
This momentous
Rise of horns
And the little
Spittles of foam
That froth at
Our legs
The sea
Creates you
A scarf
And you turn
To look at me
Your eyes
Drifting
Through the notes
Around me
Sweet
Music
Who are you
If not mine
To keep

I hear your name through the pistons
the howl of ruined trees
the dust of colored healing
now dark
circled on the center of my pillow
tail curled under the body
a camel-**** rise and fall of breath
barren as an un-sprouted cherry pit
and my scream was far away
when I heard about you
*dead

the race of the sun
pattered through

on angled feet,
the gypsy-psychic

moment stood

honeyed and crisp
ready to be bitten,

the breath told
a breeze away

from the weapon of
dusk soon approaching

come with me

said your eyes
as they picked blades

of grass and placed them
in a crown

and I took you by the teeth
and kissed you

the skyline watching
all the while

I still skip stones
across your ocean—your foaming white
cut from the butterfly vine
flips the beached fish
into the definition of liveliness
takes to the sun—a pearled pantina of ocean rain
connecting my nose and mouth
into the rainbow vision
of your thin lips mending the
the maimed crab’s claw

this is how I will always think of you
my wishing well babe
neck-deep in sand
the butterfly vine entering your mouth
pulling your tongue to say
those three words aloud
finally, like you mean it
like I want it, the ocean tide
bathing my ankles

we are here
my shoulders grow weary
let’s save
love making
for the moon

every night I go to bed and say
“just don’t”
every night I lay awake and say
“just don’t”
because two negatives make a
positive right?
and maybe if I think about us
long and hard enough
I can jumpstart my
water circus
and finally ******* cry
for once
but *******, birdie
*******
this is supposed to be a friendship
poem
filled with all the good things
about us and I turned it
into me
I turned it ugly
again
but you
sister
are beautiful

a boy looks at me
on the train
and I exit
a blister of electric through
the tracks
my shoes
lightning struck
by blueberry muffins
I run
the cold
40 degree cloud
then a thought of you
I smile
a frozen broke in
hollies

picture:

we stand in your office
and the *** crack of a homeless man
glints through the window--
a rise in sweat and speeds
so great they leave a
trail of milk to nurse
my wounds.

the eyes of a frilly moon and
your arms wrapped around
my Orion—

******* reach
for each other in the black.*

painted.

blue feet and sophistication.

the birds sifting through
the clouds
there is no chance
of rain
only sun
and the rarefaction of
wings against
molecules
ah
the simple things
when the morning is quiet
and I see
an imagined crane
perched on a branch
in the lake
we used to walk
around
the benches we used to
sit on
the black mist
that sometimes sits
around our
feet like a dog
we are not maquettes
but sculpted
made of marble
the stone birds sailing
overhead
the toy boats
the water
the lack of tears
and the machinery it takes
for me to say
*fly, fear. fly.
bring home my birdie.

fall hoppers kick to grass
as I walk down
sun-bleach lane

the anhedonia I felt yesterday
is pelted by the wind
away
away
to the breeze beyond
trash-bin creek

I walk past
a meddled roadside lover
kissing her own bloodied hand

must have been
bitten by the white-thing
panting at her feet

the image comes
and passes
with the balanced
autumn sunshine

I touch the twist of barbed wire
that guards a
re-habitated pond

a drop of blood
wells and surfaces
a moon-blazed penny

the dulled copper sting
of flesh and money
merges in the glory
of shortened days

all is accorded to the fleeting
nature of my heartbeat

that which comes and passes

wheat in color
a tan adobe
almost red
a genderless
bone
hollow and
ossified
I donate this
day to you
I enmesh
my soul
into the air
the harvest
all the while
standing
still

I wanted you
to be an expression
this mirror
of what I see
the need to run awry
barefooted
meandering through
fountains
shooting
shooting
shooting
how I feel
into the sky-confused
particles
I supposed it is your best
to lay me down
in this bed of
I
I
I
don’t want you
to leave
the edge of this
bare
unscathed
still
shining
in the high
blue
trapped and
entangled
suffused
duplexed and
flexing
oh lord
leaving
leaving
leaving
in the eve of this
summertime

I broke up with you last night
because it is my duty to
go lana del rey ghost hunting
in the target parking lot
please
don’t take this personally

Xmas
I forget to breathe
and choke
while looking at my hands
and I realize I am
quite vain
a popstar
basking in hazardry
the snow you are meant
to see
You don’t know me
until
You go inside
and we kiss hands coming
out of the dark
you don’t know me until
the moment I ask you
to believe
there will be an Xmas when
the ice cracks blue
and I am not thinking
my imagination of us
old and riding a public bus
sliding down the glass
defying gorilla tape
I can’t even stop
half of myself
and know
Pain
Pain
Pain
Yes to
Love
Love
Love

*
* *
     *
* *
(snow falls)

settle in the rose—
a hideaway.
my shoulders turn
the air.
my scapula-
smooth moments—
dead.
living.
intrazombie.
it’s my smoke which
wicks your
love—the foolish
gray, unfree and
blind. I believe
I am half—troubles
far. fingers
burning ginger
freckles through
the white page.
somehow
the rock and flint
set you afire.