The words I used to use
Always end up crashing all around me.
Falling lights scrape the crown away from me.
I have ever only felt broken
And I don’t want to fight anymore.
I feel like this world is always letting go.
And the sky turns to dark each day.
I’m sorry, but this is so hard to say.
I wanted to be something different.
I wanted to change the world.
But in the end, each time, I find the futility of change.
We all fall sometimes
And it hurts sometimes
And right now it is so hard to get up.
Knives poke my hands as I try to gain the strength
As I try to gather anything I can.
Everyone is laughing,
I am suffocating
No,
They won’t miss me anyways.
I am falling as hard as the rain
And my time is coming to rest.
I cannot handle this test alone.
So breathe life into my soul
Before I die alone.
Someone **** this feeling inside.
I cannot choose to reside these things.
Bring me up
Lend me a hand
So I can attempt to
…
Rise
I was never shown the way to be.
This life only proves what I can’t be.
So take a look at me
Poke at my imperfections
String me up and leave me to hang.
I cannot take much more
I was expected to be strong,
But I am cracking at the base.
I am crumbling to dust.
There was no sense of control.
I slowly feel the light fading away.
No one wants me to stay.
And if this was goodbye
Could you look me in the eye?
See the pain hidden deep inside.
I don’t know where to begin
But now I am feeling the weight of every sin.
Time always goes on
But I am stuck in the same **** cycle.
I’m sorry but I can’t handle
The weight of the world upon my shoulders.
The hurtful words that come crashing down like boulders
And I don’t want to stand.
I don’t want to become buried in the sand.
My life is so slippery
And I can’t get a grip.
I can’t breathe tonight.
I cannot sleep tonight.
But when I look in your eyes
I see past the lies
And I can’t help but see how the time flies.
So breathe life into my soul
Before I die alone.
Someone **** this feeling inside.
I cannot choose to reside these things.
Bring me up
Lend me a hand
So I can attempt to
…
Rise
These mirrors wind to destruction.
They lead to the death of the most alive.
They lead to the crack in my soul
Each time the mirror tells me
Who the hell I’m supposed to be.
Someone anyone
Save me
I’m freezing.
Lacking what I need
To continue to live.
Why has death shown me its emotions?
Why have I been chosen to lead this life?
Why can’t I breathe anymore?
Why do I feel death again?
I want to be strong again.
But I am only a mere mortal.
And the only portal is hope
And I am letting it all pass me by.
This is why
I have always ever been
So ******* dead.

There's a space I have in my back yard
That has the prettiest of flowering trees
Where each scented bloom holds a fragrance of you
Along with the fondest of memories

With yellow flowers that open up like the sunrise
On the mornings you a woke in my arms

The ones in pink, the color of your blushing cheeks
When I mentioned how beautiful you were

The color of red like the hair on your head
Sparking more memories

With one flower as blue as the deep oceans hue
When we walked along the open sea

And orange like that of the sunset
As the end of our days comes to mind

With the leaves of green being that of envy
Of the man that now has you in his life

There's a space I have in my back yard
That has the prettiest of flowering trees
Where each scented bloom holds a fragrance of you
Along with the fondest of memories

death
waits for
*no one

Take a deep breath
In and out
Don’t let them see the real me
In and out
Don’t show your smile
In and out
My chest is rising
In and out
Until I reach the point when I say
In and out
Stop acting like everything is okay!
Put on your sunglasses and hide your ugly little eyes
Kind of like the way everyone tries to hide their lies.

How long will it take,
Before you realize this life isn’t fake.
I wished everything away too soon.
When I was young
I wanted the perfect family,
And a brave courageous father
But we can’t always get what we want, can we?
See I feel like my life is on a script,
Everyone knows me better than myself
And why?
Because I have closed myself off from the world.
Trapped myself in a box and I want out
But I cant!
you see
Its not up to me,
This life, this world,
Its scaring me.
I wanted it to be that when I fall
Angels catch me before I hit the ground,
But instead I am greeted by an alarming thud.
How many people have to die before you realize
That I will not compromise with who I am.
See people with depression are too busy trying to learn ourselves
And everyone else expects us to learn our content
Like a good little boy.
Don’t you see,
This life means everything to me,
You cannot prescribe me pills and medication
To change who the hell I am.
I am proud of me,
So what I get a little sad sometimes,
So what I wonder why I am here.
And all yo
u want me to do is hush
And breathe in and out.
No need for me to shout.
I am nothing
Sike!
I am everything!
depression does not control me
Depression is my cocoon
And I have emerged,
I am ready
To accept who I am,
Do not try to change me,
If you think you can love me than go ahead and try,
But please don’t make me cry,
Depression has a strong grip,
It doesn’t allow me to live,
And makes me feel like I want to die,
This is real.
The more I hide behind a smile
The more I realize that I am not okay.
And yes this poem is strange,
Call me a ******.
But don’t treat me like a mistake, like a typo.
Don’t turn your head when I say I need someone.
I hold out my hand,
But nothing happens.
I bleed out my heart,
Nothing happens.
And all you want me to do is disappear,
There is no one standing in front of the mirror.
So let me write a letter have it start like this,
Depression,
You will not win.
You will not remind me of my past sins.
Depression,
I am greater than you
Depression
You are under my feet
I am in control of my life,
I am helping others no matter the cost,
And how you ask?
What if I told you this poem is for you?
All of you.
Everyone with depression
And even those who don’t have it.
Depression will not win,
It is an outsider and not welcome in my life.
I forbid depression,
I kick it out.
Do not challenge me,
I am the challenger.
When you face me,
You better do it with a smile
This,
Is my time.
I will live my life,
And depression,
You will end.
How you ask?
I will breathe in
And out.

a man who writes,
is a man who truly bleeds

The only thing keeping you a failure
is believing that you're a failure

im going to live
by myself
surrounded by
friends
family
loved ones
thoughts
books
nature
silence
peace
solitude

cats..

but i am not alone
nor am i lonely

i have me
and right now

i am more than enough