She walked in like a dream, a moonlit glow
Lips pink as a promise I'll never outgrow.
Her eyes are dark and deep in I dive,
She kisses like secrets that I’ll never survive.

"Baby, just love me." she murmured so low,
but love is a fever that burns until it goes.
Fingers like velvet and touches like a crime,
Forever she swore on, then vanished in time.

She whispered my name like a half written wish,
left me with echoes, sadness, perfume, and sin.
Too good to be true and too wild to stay,
she was a fever dream girl fading with the day.

Working so hard towards an unachievable goal
I wonder if I will I ever find a balance
But rest doesn't help when the problem is your soul,
and over-thinking is just your talent.

In a town where gulls call over foam kissed stone,
Where sea salt grief clings to wood and bone,
Stood a hotel twenty three rooms small
A place where secrets crawled the walls.

It’s wallpaper was floral and faded red,
While whispers rose up from the unmade bed.
The year was nineteen forty seven
And she’d never know he was on his way with a vengeance

He wore a hat pulled low to hide
Eyes like storms, deep and wide.
Her name was still a song he wept
A curse he caressed a prayer half said

His love had been a ship at war
Cannons blazing towards the shore,
But her leaving? That was the gale
A wind so cruel it split his sail.

Hatred now was fuel to flame,
Drinking down whiskey
And forgetting his shame.

He climbed the stairs with measured tread
Knowing the ninth room housed her lover’s bed.
Opening the door was like splitting a scar
Inside lingered her perfume, the sounds of light jazz, the scent of cigars.

“Don’t” she cried out, but he did not hear.
The sound of revenge pounding in his ears
He pulled the steel from a coat lined dark
A love burned hand, a flint struck spark.

One shot - like thunder cracked in two,
She fell like a wave the sea once knew
The floorboards wept where she now slept
Where evil came to lay her to rest.

He left her there eyes full of dread
Hate on his lips and blood on the bed.
A man who loved like storms love the coasts
Broken down by revenge is now haunted by her ghost.

The circus came back to town last night,
Red and gold and little bit torn,
Like my heart on my sleeve, a bit weather-worn

I woke up in sequins and static again,
Mascara moons under my eyes, implying my sins.
Everyone claps when I make it look fun,
But no one sticks around when the lights come undone.

I’ve been the sad ******* the tightrope too long
Singing ballads to ghosts, always someone else’s song.
Balancing grief in a pink chiffon slip
Sipping my meds from a flask on my hip.

The elephants cry when they think we don’t see,
Caged in nostalgia just like me.
The trapeze swings, but I stay still
Frozen in mid air with no more will.

And God isn’t that the trick of the act?
To look like you’re flying with chains on your back?
To glitter in gold while you’re silently dying,
Turning breakdowns into something, something worth buying?

Carousel thoughts spin too fast,
A mirrored maze of my shattered past,
The crowd just wants their sweet matinee,
And I’m just the girl out on display.

The spotlight’s warm, but the glow’s all fake,
And I’m tired of bending just so I don’t break.
Call it a show. Call it a phase.
Call it depression in a pink beret.

Whatever it is, it’s mine to bear,
A circus of sorrow spun through the air.
And darling, I’d leave if I only knew how,
But the tent’s in my mind…
And the show’s starting now.