Talk, they say. But talk to who?
I cannot talk and neither can you.
Talk is cheap. Feelings are fleeting.
Day after day, the same day repeating.
Where does it end and with who?
I want to be happy, really I do.
But like the sadness, happiness passes.
I'm so alone amid the masses.
If you could take what's in my head.
Read it aloud, spare me the dread.
I'll let it be said, loud and clear.
All of them listen but none can hear.
It penetrates me, this life on the surface.
But does any of it really suffice?
Could someone dig deeper and see what I see.
I just want to love and have someone love me.
I write it down in shoddy verse.
It's not perfect, but it could always be worse.

Each day when I wake you press into the corners and crevices of my mind
Where you staying all day until I close my eyes.
Even then at night, you're there but clearer more central and sudden, urgent and temporal.
I see us together, a couple at last.
Sometimes in sadness, others are happy, we laugh.
Always you touch me your soft hand outstretched
I feel on skin, the ridges of your prints.

If I could be inside your fingerprint
Make me little, so little you cannot see
As I wander the channels and valleys of skin
The labyrinth of passages that are so of you
That not another on earth could ever produce
Inside your ring finger there's waves to move through
Layers upon layers of walls to peruse
There's a centre of course, the heart of your design
And when I find it, it will then become mine.

You were just here
Or was it a dream

I felt your touch
Or was it a dream

I tasted your kiss
Or was it a dream

You laughed at my joke
It's not as it seems

Stop laughing you mule
It is a dream

Come back you fool
It is a dream

I still need you
If only a dream

Some day will we be?
A dream, a dream

Or will it be just as it seems?

What can't my hands hold?
What my head and heart can.
My favourite things are not those that fit in my palm.
It's sun on my face and a sea dip - ice cold.
It's leaving to hike with no route and no plan.
It's loving someone too quick and too soon.
It's laughing so hard that my breath gets stuck.
It's laying beneath a pale white whole moon.
It's believing a little in fate but never in luck.
It's knowing in darkness there's beauty too.
It's believing in nothing and taking comfort in that.
It's in wanting a soulmate but not knowing who.
I'll never desire anything more than a feeling
In my insatiable heart forever to hold.
If it comes with a memory there's nothing more appealing.
To me those things are as good as gold.
A better gold that my hands can't hold.

I can't move in this dim room for the crowding of spirits
Each hustling and tussling, engorging the space
In all their gluttony and false exchanges something beyond their crassness changes
The air, it lightens at last
And in the corner, permeates your glance.

Clown.
Turn your smile into a frown.
I cannot stand your clumsy glee
When I am caged in roaring misery.
Let me pinch your noisy nose into a pip
Before I chew blood from my bottom lip.
I'll shove that horn where circus lights can't shine
Rather than let you steal a smile from that mouth of mine.
Clown.
I know you hide a sadness too
What I feel within me, I see in you.
That sponged on face paint cannot hide
That you're also stuck on this fairground ride.
Unending circle, rolling, rolling, round and round
Your only break from reality is that droning, clapping sound.
Clown.
I don't mean to make you cry
To make me happy, I know you try.
One kiss from you could change our fate
Your face on mine, painting a new soulmate.
I can clown too if I take on your rambunctious guise
We'll live in foolishness, exuberance and mysterious lies.

There was a horseshoe as I recall
That hung over an archway on the wall
Like a worn out halo, up so high
To this day I don't know why
Its presence haunted me so completely
Memories continuously rise up to meet me
Of this home where many ghosts play
Their games were why we didn't stay
Cushions that found their way to the floor
The radio is on but it wasn't before
The day we left I don't know well
This memory one I'd rather not tell
A bomb they said was under the car
To a new place they swept us away
And again, we started again
It was always the way.