Nature's power runs raw,
Heat and sweat saturates the skin,
Heart heaves, muscles cramp,
A rapid beat fills my ears, drowning out the world.
Dust and sand swirl,
Cracks and snaps scream through the air.
Trees crash, falling left and right-
A storm rages in the Outback.
Push further and further,
Help me, just help me escape.
The wind howls like a hungry beast,
Tearing at my skin, threatening to swallow me whole.
I am no more than a whisper in its fury.
The ground trembles under my feet,
Shifting as though the world itself is alive,
Swallowing everything in its path,
I am but a droplet, lost in its jaws.
It doesn't care.
It moves, crushes, it devours,
I've been caught up in its endless rage.
A leaf lost in a violent flood.

You're pretentious.
You keep a Che Guevara poster in your room
and colour-coordinate everything.
Your room is like a vomiting rainbow.

I hate rainbows—
their brightness, and what they stand for.
Hope and happiness
are almost as pretentious as you.

I’ve moved on.
I don’t think about what your shampoo smelled like,
Or what your opinions on my actions would be.
I’ll forget about you.
I will.

We were always so different—it wouldn’t have worked.
But when you said you liked me, I believed you.
My deep emotions scared you off...
Could you not handle them?
Handle me?

You said I was intense—
Like that was a bad thing.
Like feeling deeply
was some kind of flaw,
instead of proof
that I actually cared.

Ahh, to care,
what a horrible thing to be fought up in.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if it all bounced off my shoulder?
If I could look at you and not get that terrible knot in my stomach,
always longing for you to come back into my life.

You made me feel
like too much and not enough
at the same time.
And now—
I second-guess every action I take,
every emotion I show.

I still replay it sometimes—
The look in your eyes when it was just us two,
How you could never hold my eye,
The way your fingers traced my hair...


But I’m learning to let go.
Not all memories are meant to be lived in.
And loving you
doesn’t mean I have to stay hurt.

Drown me.
Tie a weight to my ankle—
make me claw for breath,
for I am always gasping.

I drown in my thoughts,
in my room,
in the silence that screams back.
Frustration gnaws at the edges of me.

Give me a fairy princess
with three wishes.
I’d wish for contentment,
for solitude,
maybe love.

Love—
what a strange concept.
To seek it is to spiral
through glass walls
and unanswered texts,
through the echo of being too much,
or not enough.

I want to be loved.
Is that so hard?
Is it possible?
Am I that difficult?

Possibilities and difficulties
are the seams of my skin.
An easy life?
How dull.
How dreadfully monotone.
I crave the spiral,
the chaos,
the nightly existential cross-examinations.

Perhaps I’ll find happiness.
Perhaps I won’t.

Drag me under.
Let me gasp for breath.

For I wish to be your pawn
in your well-worn game of chess—
a match you’ve played countless times,
where you already know the ending.
Checkmate me.

Play me.

Where are you from?
What a question...

My mind is from a place of quiet consolation,
My heart is missing.
I am forever searching for a place of belonging...
A place that perhaps might one day feel like home.

Where are you from?
If only I knew.

Memories of sunshine and joy are so far out of reach,
and coldness and ice surround me, not letting me see.
Ich will hier raus, hole mich hier endlich raus!

Ich komme aus einem Land voller Freude und Liebe,
Lande aber in der Trauer meines Kopfes.
Why is it so difficult for me to let go, to move on?
Perhaps one day, I will be able to.

Where are you from?
I do not know, but maybe I will one day...

Seeking the warmth of Love and Happiness,
I yearn for familiarity and family.
Pain and longing—I am familiar with.
Family... not so much.

Where are you from?
From sleepless nights and silent screams,
From questions left unanswered,
From a mirror that does not reflect the soul it holds.
Ich bin nicht von hier,
Doch wo ist hier, wenn alles fremd bleibt?

I build homes in dreams,
but wake up in rubble.
Still, a flicker of hope stays lit—
a whisper that somewhere, I will find my place.

Please help me find my place...

One day I might answer,
not with silence or a sigh,
but with a smile that says:
"I come from within—
from everything I've survived,
and all that I am becoming."

Blue stares at me in a crowd,
Seeing a blue that I knew lightyears ago.
Well I'd be ****** here you are again,
Offering me entry into a home I once knew.

Now you are smiling next to the window
Of the house we shared.
New curtains droop down next to a figure
The figure of evil.

Leaving you behind, a wave washes over me
Of sentimental longing or wisful affection.
Craving to have had won you,
To have saved you from the evil you are still so drawn to.

It's just that the moon is full,
And I hear a voice on the telephone that I knew lightyears ago.
Flicking the switch I cut out a part of myself.

The hurt of it ripping me in two,
The moon phases and I swim up, meters of blue still above me.
Stroke after stroke I rush to breathe.
Year after year I still pine after it.

Now I look out of the window with curtains that droop,
That droop down next to me
Throwing a dim light on a double bed

Patches slowly filling in,
I watch the pavement being wrapped up.
Spots of rain spitting
Against my single glazed window.

Glowing streets seem so inviting.
Warmly lit pavements giving a false hope,
A hope of calmness, like a still lake.
Opening my window, I see a stormy ocean.

You look out too, full of calm.
Warm green forest surround me,
The trees would forever give me shelter.
Turning away from you, I'm back at the window.

You run along ridges, I feel embarrassed.
Brown coiling around my fingers,
pulling me in for more.
You are silencing the storm outside.

Taking my hand, leading me away,
To show me the world I was missing out on.
A layer of linen and love keeping me safe,
You gave me a shelter from the Storm.

Building up ever so much,
not waiting for me to come back.
Home, what even does that mean?
I have nowhere that feels like home.

I look at you staring out the window
observing the sunset
taking in all the streaks of yellow, orange, and pink.
You never liked pink as a kid
I suppose we've moved past childish preferences.

Step into my life—
Rip me away with you,
Into bits you shape,
Until I’m wholly yours..

Make me wholly yours so that I won't live without you
As you'll forever be a part of me.

The poetic mind is forever troubled with questions but no answers,
Perhaps that's what draws us together
The constant unfulfillment with life as it is.

Are you looking, or just seeing
through mirrors, through windows?
Are you able to see through it all
Or are you too stuck in your head—

like me,
tracing outlines of thoughts
I’ll never say aloud.
Maybe silence is safer
than risking a world
that doesn’t echo back.

If I whispered my truth into the dusk,
Would you turn your head and listen tentatively
or shut me out like the wind.

Listen, world—
I have a voice that can shake you.
Listen here,
Do you not know my language

Or will you pretend you don’t speak
The dialect of my ache?

I grieve like it was a death,
But no one sends flowers
It slipped out quietly,
no funeral,
just echoes
where laughter used to live.

Who have I become?
a mosaic of all the people that I've ever met
filled with the sadness of my shadows.
I don’t know your face
When I pass mirrors now—

You look at me like you know me
I wonder what you recognize my soul has changed
My soul has warped into something bitter and rotten
longing for tending to
like a flower that wilts away after neglect.

If only I could reach
beyond the cracks in my skin...
...But I cannot reach
beyond the glass between us—
where my reflection waits,
And I am always just out of reach.

Streaks of sunlight make your eyes ever so blue,
Like oceans lit by morning’s grace.
I wish I had eyes like that—
Eyes that can capture,
And never let them drift laway.
They hold me still,
Right where you want me.

I’m falling—
Uncertain, unconscious,
No map, no anchor,
No promise that the chute will open.
But still, I fall.
I fall for you.
And somehow, that fall feels like flying.

Help me find solace in the storm.
Be the calm when the thunder grows close.
Shelter me when the rain won’t stop—
When skies crack open and shadows swell.
Just stare out with me into the grey,
And hold me like you'll never let me go.

If I break, let it be in your arms.
If I fade, let me fade beside you.
And if I soar—
Let it be because you believed I could.

Decisions over discussions,
Help me find solace in my ruthless mind.
Glasses blur. Windows reflect.
Order has been lost.
Hell has frozen over.
Shadows are lit.
Nothing is right—
My thoughts race backwards.

I just want a place with you,
In the eternal sunshine of your heart.
You have cool hands.
Don’t make me change. I don’t want to.
Coastlines have cliffs and beaches—
But I am the wave,
Crashing again and again,
Never reaching.

Hold out your hand for me.
Let me grip it.
Trust me not to pull you down.
But you shake your head
As I drown,
The weight in my heart
Defies my kicking limbs.
Fireflies light up my face in the wild woods.
Streams run down my cheeks.
Lungs tear in half—
I am forced to stop.
Forced to stop running:
From you.
From me.
From my life.
From my mind.

Practice over skill,
But I am too tired to care.
Too tired to try.
Frozen at the edge of the bed.
Sweat saturates the sheets.
Vivid dreams
Rip me back to you.

I just want a place with you.

I sit for hours.
My coffee cools into silence.
Eyes heavy.
Stomach knots.

I ache for comfort—
Can you give it?
You were the best thing to happen to me.
So why must I ruin it?

Speak to me in riddles.
Keep me guessing.
Make me wait.
Make me beg.
I am truly yours—
And you don’t even know.

"Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same."
I whispered Brontë like a secret.
Maybe hoping you'd hear it
In the space between my words.

You are too good
Too pure
I get lost in the worry of not being good for you
Don't let me pollute you.

You smile at me
Like the sun caught in a window.
I try not to stare too long.
I try not to hope too hard.
The fear of getting lost hangs in the air.

Every look you give me
Feels like a maybe.
Every silence
Feels like a no.

I love the waiting—
The little moments,
The crumbs of you
That I gather like gold.

But it hurts.
Not knowing.
Balancing between “maybe he does”
And “maybe he never will.”

Still, I stay.
Eyes heavy.
Coffee cold.
Heart full,
And aching.

Nenne mich nicht bei meinem Namen,
nenne mich so, wie du mich erinnerst –
als Wärme zwischen kalten Tagen,
als Stimme, bevor ich verstummte.

Let me make it up to you.
I have disappointed you,
humiliated and hurt you,
my apologies taste like silence now.

Ich sehe dich in meinem Spiegel,
doch mein Blick weicht aus.
Akzeptanz rinnt langsam,
wie Sand durch zitternde Finger.

I am you, I am me,
split in the middle,
half apology, half hope.
And I don’t know which half is mine.

Hilf mir, mich wieder zu lieben,
wenn auch nur ein wenig –
wenn auch nur für einen Moment,
in dem dein Blick mich wieder trägt.

Let me rebuild the bridge I burned,
step by step, breath by breath.
I’m tired of being a stranger
in my own chest.

Ich schreibe mich neu
mit tobender Hand.
Kein Held, kein Retter,
nur jemand, der wieder anfangen will.

Freezing in your warm grip.
I don’t want to blame you —
you were never at fault.
You grew tired of sneaking around my shards,
too afraid of cutting me
to be yourself.

I am fragile,
hurt,
but I never meant
to turn you into that —
into something heavy with worry,
something stitched from empathy.
I never wanted your voice
to be a balm for my chaos.

You should have been the hammer,
breaking the glass around me
so I could finally breathe.
Help rebuild me —
if it’s not too late.

I know I pushed you away.
And the echo of that loss
has made me bitter,
too bitter to let you return.
This eternal, internal battle
will be the end
of the person you once loved.

The loss of you
will leave me changed —
not ruined,
but never the same.

Shadows of the words I said
cast darkness onto your sunlight.
I blocked the light from reaching you.
I stopped you from growing —
from blooming
into something beautiful.

The hot sand burned my feet
as we walked
side by side,
hand in hand.

But love,
spelled backwards,
is evol.

And as we rewind,
all I see
is how I hurt you.

For what it’s worth,
those words tremble from my lips
more often than not —
unheard, unacknowledged,
as though I’m only ever half-there,
a shadow at the edge of your focus.
For what it’s worth,
you once had a place
in the quiet corners of my heart —
not a home,
but a storm shelter
cracked at the seams.
A battleground of quiet wars
where even silence left bruises.
I rewrite the truth,
try to shape it into something soft,
something you might believe.
But it slips through.
Nothing I do seems to hold.
Nothing feels certain.
I change direction
like a car caught in a roundabout —
circling, circling,
too afraid to choose a way out.
Every road leads somewhere,
and somewhere might hurt.
So I don’t move.
And while I stall,
the engine inside me starts to burn.
The pressure builds.
The heat rises.
But still — I wait.
Because moving means deciding,
and deciding means risking being wrong.
Help me.
Say something I understand.
Your silence is a language
I never learned to speak.
For what it’s worth —
I want to understand.
But I’m burning.
Slowly, completely —
as the engine heats up
and demands a choice.
Any exit might save me,
might stop the flames.
But I keep circling.
Until the engine explodes —
and pieces of me
fly in every direction,
even the ones I tried hardest to avoid.
Now, for what it’s worth,
all that’s left
is wreckage made from hesitation,
scattered through the silence
we never learned to break.

Clear the house and find old poems —
the ones never meant to be read,
never meant to be heard.
But you tore through them
like you tore through my soul.
I cannot do it.
I cannot bear the thought
of you reading my mind,
of you reading my soul.
Let me erase your memory
so we can live on.
The flowers have finished drying.
Time is ticking.
And we can’t rewind.
It is out of my control.
You stare at me with silent eyes —
the kind that stay still when I reach.
Let me make contact,
just once.
I didn’t have much regard
for the little things
until you left —
the smell of your hair
on the pillow next to mine,
the way your fingers curled in sleep,
or how you always left the light on,
just in case.
I walk through rooms
where your absence hums
louder than my footsteps.
I try to trace the memory of your voice
against the silence.
And still —
I would give anything
to hear you say my name again,
not with anger,
not with regret,
but softly,
as if you had never left.
For you have haunted me in my dreams
and will forever be a part
I cannot retrieve.
I would give anything
to be the version of myself
you once reached for
in the dark.

Are you where you're meant to be?
Every choice you've made has built you.
Did the wrong turns pull you from the life that was meant to be yours?

I have wronged — and so have you.
We’ve strayed so far,
we’ve forgotten the path altogether.

And yet —
I’m so glad to be lost in this world
if I’m lost with you.

We sit in meadows that rise above our knees,
and you laugh at me
for tucking my trousers into my socks.
“I’m scared of ticks,” I remind you.
You roll your eyes —
but your smile is the softest thing I know.

I could sit here forever,
in this tall, wild field,
beneath a sky
bluer than I ever imagined.

But even now,
in all this gentle quiet,
something heavy sits behind my ribs.
It doesn’t speak —
it doesn’t need to.

It just is,
and it always has been.
I watch your face tilt toward the sun,
like a flower that trusts spring to come.

And I wonder —
how do you do it?
How do you believe in warmth
when winter still lives in your chest?
You ask me if I’m okay,
and I say yes,
because it would break the moment if I didn’t.
Because you look so happy.
Because this field is beautiful,
and the sky is trying so hard
to love me back.

And maybe that’s enough for now.
To sit beside you,
ticking moments into the earth
like seeds that might one day grow
into something lighter than this.

The sun slips lower,
and everything turns to honey.
You lean back on your elbows,
laugh lines deepening as you squint toward the horizon.
I memorize them like scripture.

I don’t know how long I’ll feel like this —
like I’m walking through syrup,
like I’ve misplaced the parts of myself that used to shine.
But when you brush your hand against mine,
even accidentally,
I feel the tiniest pull back to the surface.

I want to believe that this is real.
That something so soft
can last in a world that feels so sharp.
That you won’t tire of waiting for the better version of me
I keep promising it's just around the bend.

I want to stay.
Not just here, in this meadow —
but here, with you,
in whatever this is
we are quietly building
between silences and eye rolls and tucked-in socks.

If I lose myself again —
if the dark comes fast —
please, just remind me of today.

Remind me that once,
in a field of tall grass,
I felt the light,                                                           ­                                                and I welcomed it in.

Come back to me, my love.
The nights collapse without you.
Silence wraps around me like frost
and the stars — they whisper your name
so softly it bruises.
You haunt the darkness of my chest,
echo in the hollows
where your hands once rested.
Each breeze tastes like you,
feels like the breath you never took
when you left.
I reach for you in dreams
only to wake with fists full of absence.
I replay every moment —
not to remember you,
but to pretend you're still here with me.
Come back to me, my love.
Time has not healed me;
it has hollowed me out
to leave a space only for you.                                                                                                                   What they call healing
is just learning how to walk
without my heart.
I carry your ghost like an Armor,
like a wound that glows.
I should hate you
for leaving
but all I can do
is beg the air to bring you back.
Scars fade —
but you don’t.
You burn steady in my blood,
a name I cannot forget
even when I scream it into nothing.
I want to forget you —
and I don’t.
I want to erase you —
and hold you tighter.
If you stood beside me now,
I would be whole.
I would finally be real.
I am more myself
when I am with you.
And without you,
I am no one at all.