I used to be good at school,
now, I'm struggling to pass.

I used to eat a lot,
now, if you do see me eat, watch where I go next.

I used to get 10 hours of sleep,
now, I'm lucky to get 3.

I used to wear short sleeves and dresses,
now, I need to hide the blood.

The changes were subtle at first and nobody seemed to notice.
(not that anyone was looking.)

But piece by piece I fell apart,
now I'm too broken to be fixed.
(not that anyone would think about trying.)

Now I'm the one with the rope in her closet,
waiting for midnight to begin her decent.

I'm used to being canceled on,
To being stood up,
To being left out.
I'm used to being blamed,
To being bullied,
To being invisible.
I'm used to crying in my room,
To the lack of sleep,
To the feel of the blade on my arm,
To the purging after a meal.
I'm used to it all.
Don't feel guilty
I've learned to lower my expectations
To try and make these things not matter.
I'm used to it,
All of it.