At what point should I worry
When the exhaustion
Continues day
After day

The worst malaise this year
Skipping activities
Laying in bed
No appetite
Don't feel
Right

It's back
And I don't
Have the motivation
To move through it again

how do i not fall
into the arms of others?
i find another

Here I am, the smallest fire.
Too cool for spark to light desire.
Libido, just fond memory.
I simply lack the energy.

Here I am, the faintest whisper.
Too soft to stir the eager mind.  
A meagre void. A hollow blister.
A structure of the softest kind.

Here I am, the thinnest stream.
Too sparse to nourish fertile land.
Wishing to make worlds of difference,
But much too weak to lend a hand.

Here I am, an open wound.
Too lacking life to ever mend.
Cover me in cloak and shadow,
And let my weary mind pretend.

Amongst the midnight sky,
I stare at a rose as it dies.

Its pedals are torn and bruised,
such a precious thing to lose.

Yet, when I stare into the full moon,
I see that it will be daytime soon.

When I hear a girl's sorrowful cries,
I know that a new rose begins to arise.

Those pedals are lush and red,
nowhere close to being dead.

And as I find her inside my heart,
I know that I am not falling apart.

I finally realize who I really am,
it definitely took some time but, ****.

It was all worth it in the end.

how does one
learn to truly be content
with the uncomfortable silence
of self-reliance?

When silence is evoked.
And the world is at rest.
The only sound one hears.
Is.
Pitter, Patter.
Pitter, Patter.
As your heart says.
I'm.
Still.
Here.

We have mined our mountains,
we have fished our seas,
we have felled our forests,
we have gathered our grains,
but we have not yet embraced
the infinite energy of our souls,
which is love.

TOD HOWARD HAWKS