I'm a self flagellator with a long
memory
I collect my whips carefully
with painful precision
I love you like a poet
you love me like a mathematician

I remember that night
mouth dry, my stomach a lava lamp
the words bubbling up to my mouth
I asked you to marry me
and you said yes
but on further reflection
it turned into no

I reach for your hand first
Said I love you first
But I always do
Life is complicated
and we're not 22

so I keep coming by
complicate me to uncomplicate you
hoping you'll finally see what I do

French fries with mayonnaise
Taking off shoes just to put them on again
Listening to the Cure
Wondering where that girl went

I keep going the wrong way
am I too far gone to change direction jimmying locks, trying doors
more closed than open now

I'm not sure which is true
Those days I don't care or
These days that I do

Are all those kisses
Trying to convince me
Or trying to convince you

You say "I love you"
I say baby, I'm lonely
Lost in translation

Where's your head at
(song stuck in my head)
Where my head is at
is
this rabbit hole of upside down thinking
What does it feel like to go crazy?
Do we get warnings or just ****** through
like the air we're made of
this tenuous hold on reality, on normal
how close we are to being un, ab

synchronized drowning it looks like swimming
it looks like I'm treading, it looks like I'm living
I seem light but I'm heavy
an anchor in hiding
and the only thing you'll get
by swimming in my vicinity
is pulled under with me