She's one of those beautiful mysterious ones.
The one that has absolutely no clue just how radiating she is.
Quiet but always thinking.
When she does speak her intelligence & eloquence flows out.
Kindness that melts your heart.
Her humor catches you by surprise.
That smile of hers fills the room with a force of enchantment.
I wish she could see what I see.
That she's not a **** among flowers.
But that she's a ******* beautiful rose bush.
Powerful with its twirling roots under ground.
Those thorns.. a force to be reckoned with.
She is like a closed rose bud hiding away.
But my God when she opens up and blooms.
You get blessed to see her for all the magnificent beauty that she is.
Full of color. A rarity.  
Like a galaxy full of shooting stars.
I wish she could see what I see.

I want you to not forget.
That you've tried this route before.
It didn't fix anything.
Temporary 30 second buzz.
Isn't worth the shame or headache.
You still end up right where you left off.
You're so much more than this.
You are hurting, you need a shoulder to cry on.
Not a bottle of illusion.
Scream, cry, sing... your way through it.
The feeling will pass.
It always does.
I know it feels impossible right now & this seems like a good solution.
But I promise you it's not.
Think about your beautiful children...
They are your world.
You are teaching them how to love themselves by your actions.
So love yourself furiously.
For you are so worthy.
Call a friend, ask for a hug.
You aren't alone.
You don't have to do this.

On golden shores on white sands,
Stands a blue catamaran.
With toil, love, skillfully made.
Though paint chips off, colors fade.
It's built from logs of hardy wood,
A fisherman... his livelihood.
He sails each day, with hopes new,
His life, his love on a rippling blue.

On calm waters when sun shine beams,
When the shimmering bay glistening gleams,
When waves dance, in tandem sway
Where sun rays wink, hide and play.

On vengeful days when waters mock,
When menacing gales toss and rock,
When dark clouds engulf the bay,
When the world anchored safely stays.

But the sun kissed fisherman,
Sails each day his catamaran..
Never tethered on safe shores he,
For thats not where he's meant to be.

As he sails the coastal bay,
I see him fade.. far away
Singing songs, in the distance he,
His love, his life, his hope..the sea.

She was no saint, no wonder woman and yet
my mom possessed some of those qualities.
A strong sweet person, with a loving heart.

My father was no fool, but with mom's quite
strength and guidance he was a better, smarter
man and family leader. This fact never more
obvious than after she died at 54 and he had to
cope on his own without her. A grieving man
reduced to a child for a time. He never fully
recovered. Rational decisions eluded him.

No matter how well it's constructed,
Every ship needs a good compass and
strong rudder and my mother was ours.
My brother and I though grown and
aging men, still steer the course she charted.