We're naked in you car baby
Driving slow
Are we're doing this or not baby?
Let me know
We're losing heat and losing fast lately
I'm getting cold
If we're nothing take the next bend drop me at home

Worldly pleasures and passions aside
Riddled with want and mangled desire
Nothing on the earth compares to to the fire
Of reaching and scratching a demanding hive

Curious I know
But damaged as most
Sterile and wicked and panicked I know
To heartlessly speak and poke at the nose
Carry your weight and soul afloat
On the rivers of worries that stear your boat
The past is the past
And future no joke
But curiouser and curiouser
And couriouser you grow

I am far too afraid
To go that way
The path seems dark and murky
Though my heart will erase
The memories made
And leave them all behind me
I must walk
I must move
No more talk
Time to prove
But I am far too afraid
To go that way
And leave this world behind me

I was afraid to touch the glass
It would undoubtably have left a mark
One that had the power and girth
To ruin the life I've built on Earth
If I forgave myself for peeking inside
Would my heart have survived the violent desire
Or the pain that my want would have birthed
I would have to learn to forgive myself
But would God have forgiven me first

Wasted time
combed thin and fine
washed up on the rim of the bath like grime
given like a mirror to the blind
taken from the absent of mind
How quickly you've disappeared from my eyes
My dear wasted time...

In the corner is safe
Safe from the four walls that stare me don't
I'll bury myself in this right-angled paradise
Where there is only room for me

I've made my heart into a well
And filled it with all kinds of hell
I've locked inside
The nights I've cried
Until it dried and became a shell

Please excuse the mess
I don't clean up often
I let my thoughts lay around like stockings
Create piles of memories in corners and pockets
Until everything I look for is  lost and
I'll still toss in some more reasons through the seasons of dropping
Little bits and drips of emotions and mocking
Every and any lover who tries to stop me
From building up a wall of unexamined issues and problems
That follows me from place to place as angry as an angry mob could
So as you can tell
I don't have time to mop a tile or pack a shelf
And still, make a bed and be a friend as well

When you don't understand my pain
you don't understand my pride
My heart beats all the same
Whether you're far or near my side

If we are not us
And  I am not me
Then what is it that either could be?
Having submerged myself into the deep
Leaving not a morsel for myself to keep
one plus one would never equal three
So I became one half of two
Forgetting my singularity
merged to a tether that never belonged to me
and without even a letter
had left and forgotten me
Leaving neither us to be us
Nor me to be me
Leaving both I and we without an identity

The thing about love
There's no air spaces between those letters
You suffer alone or give without measure
You take to the sky on your own
Or have your wings severed
To be lonely or suffocated
Which would be better?
To love or to fly
That is the question

I had a nightmare that shook my chest
And when I woke up it was still right there in my vest

It a **** awful night to love you the way I do
With a heat that burns my heart and bakes straight through
My chest and sheets and mattress too
But when the morning finally comes
You would have never knew

They said I don’t connect
I’m an island at best
My shores leave no doors for ships to meander in
I have some sort of infection causing an alien imperfection
In the middle of the space between my outer and inner section
And as a result of natural selection

It requires human intervention

To produce a cure rather than a prevention
I know I’m not attracted to human interaction
They say this is a reaction to the way I feel abandoned
Or some **** of that standard
That I’m not really aware was apparent
But here’s an idea of what defective is
We had a conversation and I could barely get a word in
So put that in parenthesis
And forget I ever mentioned it

But before you go and question me
Look inwardly and a reflect a beat
If the quality of your conversation is so impeccably pristine
Then why the heck intercept my life with your analogies
Of the way I don’t stay in the hay of your society
And be bought by the back and forth of whats right and what couldn’t be
Or whats possibly normality
Or something that just might look like it
I cut myself loose from the discussion of that entirely

So if you gonna look at me
For whatever reason that may be
You might as well surrender to see
That I might just be
The only normal thing
About this whole **** topic, I’m openly addressing

My bed is my bed
There's no place I'd rather be instead
It's where I lay my head
Down to rest
My bed is the best

I woke up in the midst of my suffering
To realize that my feelings were swollen
And my heart was sore
And that it was a gift to have to apply bandages to your wounds
And that having time to tend to your swollen feelings
Meant that you've been given another day
And having feelings inside of you meant that you're still alive

I am dying
And I don't remember in between suffering
But sometimes, after I've opened my eyes to the light of day
And lay in that curve in my bed that I've lied in many mornings before
And I can feel it
Its hands and knees crawling inside of me
And I remember
The way I did many times before
That its been a part of me since the day I was conceived
And that we should sympathize together
Because we've had the same destiny since the beginning of time

Sometimes anywhere is nowhere
And sometimes thats the most comforting place to be

Crystal, Silver, and Diamonds
if i give my life to you,
would You love me too?
Shimmer Glisten that Ivory
i lose my religion to you
to make me beautiful
the Lights are Shinning
Brighter than lightning
my One True Love is here
Shattered the atmosphere
I'm dressed to the nines in Him
head to toe striking
my One true Love is here
Mr. Velveteen

I'm feeling all kinds of tired
Like I've lost a piece of my mind somewhere
In the blossom of a new desire
One for which I didn't prepare

It stalks me
I keep my eyes open out of fear
How can I return to the me I used to be
Because no matter how far I run it'll always be near

I think of her often
This beautiful force
I followed her into my head one night
And got lost

For goodness sake
My heart still beats
Air still crashes through my lungs when I breath
Veins still spit blood onto my skin when I bleed
My eyes still follow lines down pages when I read
My thoat still expands and contracts when  I eat
My waist still leads to knees then down legs to my feet
And someday you'll remember that  I'm still a human being
Even after I acted beast when I said those things

Mothers watched boys being stolen from their beds
In the midst of their dreaming
To become men that couldn't fend off the nightmares when they slept

When I was a drinker
I would swallow my weight
And lay weightless in the bathroom
Until I forgot  my  own name

It took hours to stop the bleeding
And years after
The wound was still healing

And so the lark sings
To the day's first dawning
Some dusty motel
Sees a woman fawning
And at once it's all over
For naught but for wanting.

It takes time to feel
What has not yet healed
I felt and kneel
And wavered a shield
And paited skys teel
Like a flickering film real
It shook me like an electric eel
My eyes forever seal
Because this moment can't be real

Sunrise rise from the dusk
For all the animals to busk
From the elephants tusks
Fall the butterflys husk

It started like an ending
And began as it finished
Even found its all missing
Running fast as it walks slow
Becoming bigger as it was growing smaller
As absent the present mind
While it was becoming something, it was nothing
Broken fixed things
Opened already closed eyes
Melted ice solid in the cold of the warmest air
That was the truth of the lies
And as dead as it was alive

Truthfully and honestly
A flower blooms
In the guitars strings of life
But dies in the trumpets of floorboards
And tugs at the armhairs
And red beard of the goats belly
Twice now I've come across
As we are all voyagers
And walk of the tips of out feet
And a plague on all cowards

The future is a beautiful and terrifying place

No matter how much I change
I always end up wishing I was someone better
When the true is
I always end up back in this place
Where I'm the same person I started out with
I'm a liar
I the idea that I can change myself is the biggest lie I've told yet

It's unhealthy
But you left so stealthily
In the  morning while it was pouring ounces
Remembering those days ever since
You stepped out into the rain from where my love is
Now I'm hunched over the basin trying to rinse
Your face out of my hair

Perfection
I chanted at my reflection
As if answering a question
asked by their rejection

My favorite song
Reminds me of you
My rhythms gone
In every single tune
My visions lost
And every colour's blue
I can't do
The things that I usually do
Its all consumed
By you

I don't wanna wild
And I don't free
I don't wanna be swept away
By the wind you see
Take me out of the hurricane
Cause it's lingering
I don't wanna be lost in the moment



I just wanna be his

He was a man
He was much bigger than me
His heart bigger than his chest and it towered over me

You don't stroke my hair
Your hands stay far from mine
Far from the time our fingers intertwined
To me your smile can still be seen
When I witness your smile at things that aren't me
Your eyes don't share secrets as they did before
What we share is years, nothing less, nothing more
So don't touch me now
My skin might tare
The years have stripped it dull and bare
Don't hang around
And don't stroke my hair
I've already forgotten that you were ever there

I look for meaning
I write it down
I make it rhyme with different sounds
Then I share it
Like I'm doing now
This little bit of honesty
I think I found

You came in with the rain
And the winds and thunder were following
Now the clouds have long since passed
But I'm still dripping

Oh, Scarlet's got a boyfriend now
She says she thinks she found the one
Well I don't what love is all about
I'm happy for her anyway

Oh they say that "You've missed out"
Cause you don't understand the misery
Oh they say that "you've gotta find out
I'd rather keep it all a mystery

My friend don't you worry about me
I'm fine
I got my head on my shoulders
My friend only cares about things
like time
She say we're only getting older

We all cry from time to time
In between sheets and behind our eyes
When the heaviness of everything weighs on our minds
We scream out in agony these very lines:
How could the world be so unfair to me
When I was born a baby with nothing to share or bring
Yet it placed its weight down on my bare skin
And gave me the sharp end of all it has to give
And while I haven't yet cause any sins to be punished
It made it its business to show me whats ugly
And even though there are those who suffer much deeper
Pain than I have ever come to witness
I know that there are those living abundantly
Who have done things thats deserving of this suffering
I may be no saint but I am no demon either
So lift up your reigns and give me my freedom

Why do my eyes want to see you?
When there are there are constellations and mountains and sunsets to look at
Yet my eyes are not satisfied until they find you
With your tired eyes that shut slowly behind the steam from your coffee mug
While the flowers are blooming and valleys are forming and cherry blossom petals are fluttering to the ground
I'm gazing over at you
My back turned to any other sight that could be more fulfilling
What more is there to see after I've spent hours facing you?
Why do my eyes tear when they can't find your face?
I have already found every freckle on your cheeks
Smile and make them dance for me
Let those hidden creases below your cheek bones bend and breath when you let your laugh out
Throw your head back and let those curls take flight
Just be you doing what humans do
Reacting to things as a human being should
As I'm reminded that most things are more worth seeing
Than a basic normal average human being
My eyes widen and whisper to me
"This is the show we came to see"

I never played with fire
I was too scared I'd get burnt
But, I played with you
And got myself hurt

I want to feel love
Swelling up inside me like a cancer
that doctors can't cut out of me  
And spreads so rapidly
through my entire being
so that even my soul feels it

Am I what I fear?
When she's so frighteningly near
Almost ear to ear
Closer still my dear
Close like the sea to the pier
A bee to nectar
Monarch to his sceptre
She's the sun on my receptors
Her skin has a temper
Like piping hot embers
It burns through November
In the African weather
My skin turns to leather
And I crease under pressure
That I almost whisper
What is kept under murmur
Still she comes hither
I'm at the end of my tether
So I let the words flutter
And escape through the stutters
Of my mouth as I utter
Things we should never mutter
To ourselves or each other
Come sunshine or thunder
But she's a storm like no other
And when we came close to each other
She destroyed my shelter
Drenched I stand here to tell her
While she's so frighteningly near
Almost ear to ear
"Come closer my dear,
For I am what I fear"

We've been here before
And its never been "amazing"
A word reserved for new beginnings
Not the same old same things
So familiar and worn
That its browning and aging
As if left out on the lawn
Because its not worth saving

To afford "amazing" would be amazing
But amazing is not a necessity
Other needs are more pressing
So it fades from our vocabulary
To make room for whats usable
Like things that aren't accessories
And like the boxes in the garage
It fades from our memories

I drew a circle around you
And set you aside
I plucked you from the masses
And called you mine

Maybe you didn't mean to hurt me
Maybe you had a bad day
Maybe there's a war raging inside of you that I'm not a part of
Maybe I spoke too much
Maybe I said something that hurt you
Maybe I should apologize for striking a nerve
Maybe I'm being unfair
Maybe I'm giving you too little credit
Maybe I shouldn't just assume next time
Maybe its just one of those days
Maybe I should justblet this one slide
Maybe everything will be better tomorrow?