How do I love You?
How have I loved You?
You shower me with gifts, with praises, with affection,
and I can't even give You the time of day.

I ask, I seek, I knock,
and You provide.
Why can't I do the same for You?

You ask to drink from my heart,
to let my tears quench Your Thirst.
How can I withhold?

You seek me in the wilderness,
in the darkness I shroud myself in.
How can I stay hidden?

You knock on the door of my heart,
my sanctuary,
to fill it with Your Life and Love.
How can I keep it shut?

I've whispered through the keyhole,
pressed my hand to Yours through the wood.
But why did I neglect to turn the ****?

Please don't go.
I haven't forgotten You.
I'm still on the other side of this door.
If You knock,
I promise I'll answer.

It just rained.

The sky is pale blue and
the wind is surely pleasing.
I might just think that the weather is perfectly made for me.

I see some tables and chairs,
some drinks and snacks,
some variety of people
I only see during this time of the day
and only during this kind of weather.

It's 6 PM and
it's almost as dark
as the deepest of the night.
The sky now is indigo blue
and the moon is already peaking.
It's smiling.
And god, what I'd do to smile like that.

I see drinks, I am holding a cup of rootbeer
while my friends hold a cup of red horse.

We talk about life, and how scary it is to live;
we talk about ending it, and the many ways we could consider trying;
we talk about enduring it, and how strong we are to have ourselves survive 'til today;
and we talk about staying, just because we're still here.

Though we're barely breathing,
we are here,
and just like the moon tonight,
with the cup of rootbeer in my hand
and with the cup of red horse they have,
we are smiling.

It's almost 8 PM and
the wind is still as pleasing.
It's touching my skin
and
it gives me a different feeling.
I see hands holding a grip to its last cup of beer;
I see eyes looking down, sleepy;
I see eyebags which I guess I can say as deep as the night;
I see crooked teeth;
I see imperfection.

Though we are as imperfect,
we are smiling,
we survived,
we're on our way home
with car lights reflecting on our faces.

We wave goodbye to the bottle of beer for two and my rootbeer.
We made it through the night.

In your eyes
I see a different light,
A lighter side of you
And that's when I realize
How beautiful you are to me.

From the softness of your skin,
The wonderful smile on your face
Beauty that's outside in
Divorcing all other thoughts of you.

From Cleopatra of my soul,
To the Halle Berry of my dreams,
You are one well-put together woman I would like to know
No matter how crazy it may seem.

Like the sweet nectar in the morning
I bathe in your loving arms
Your love, your love is showing
Making me sweat from my head to my palms.

You with me alone
Basking in the moonlight
With such love and appreciation shown
That really makes my night.

Me with you together
With words unspoken the best way
No matter the weather
With nothing really to say.

Moonlight O moonlight,
Can you just shine on me please?
Make our night such a delight
As I kneel on my knees.

You, me and the moonlight,
Alone together night after night,
How 'bout us?
How 'bout you and I?

(C) 2004

It’s interesting:
you can spot a fallen-away Catholic
by the language they use-
once learned, it can’t be taken away.
Catholicism leaves an indelible mark
on the tongue,
a pattern in the script.
People jaded,
wounded,
even rejected by wayward sheep
and wolves in their skin
bear the same brilliance
the same cry for understanding.
The Shepherd didn’t meet their expectations,
or maybe they’ve abandoned all belief in His existence.
No matter the qualm,
they all bleat the same.
There’s no removing the brand of baptism,
the vocabulary of vocations.
Even if a wall has been built
between them and the Church,
they still write the creed of their Fathers on its bricks.

This is not a reprimand,
nor a criticism;
it is a hand outstretched
to all who broke away.
It is a voiced desire
to teach
and learn
by their side.
This life does not hold all the answers,
but we can pursue Knowledge Himself
and reach the peak together.

i've found myself swerving off the road when the sun is setting.
when splashes of orange, pink, yellow spray across the summer sky my eyes wander away from the road and i'm lost in the color.
i've risked my life just to catch a glimpse of heaven's painting, and i think that's how it is every time i look at you.
i chase sunsets like i chase you,
always wanting to see more of you and not being able to stop myself.
you're as beautiful as a sunset,
and i'll keep chasing you until i crash.