I was kind of unsure
But not anymore!

Shine your light upon me
So that I may see
The very thing that enraptured me.
Upon your arrival into my life,
I found that my burdens grew light.
True love is when you find a friend,
Who loves you and will help you grow
Until the end.

Do you remember
When things were simple?

I’m not sure
If I’m my own problem
All this time
Blaming others.

Is it my own fault?
Am I why I’m like this?

Would you rather
Innocence
Or truth?

A sad girl
Emptiness in her world
She never saw
The light in her.

A lonely boy
He never felt the joy
Of having someone to talk to
Until he found you.

I love you
But you
Can’t stand me
You see
An annoying pest
That’s best
To ignore

All these stories in my head
I’d rather write instead
Of changing my real life for the better.

Help me
Cuz I need you

I forgot how to love.
Now I am mistaking things
For what they aren’t.

Can I depend on you?
Do you think so too?
Can I let you in?
Can I trust in you?

I am comfortable with you.
Should I be?

I’m not a kid
Not an adult
I’m something else, something more
Not an adult
Not that mature
But some of my innocence left

Don’t you dare

Where am I?
Where did I go?

Why can’t I find me?

You look at me like you’re nervous.
You ask me why I was staring at you.
I pretend I wasn’t.
I tell you I was reading the poster behind you.
You look away.
Memories of you come back.
I don’t know if I love you again.
Do I want to?
Do you?
Please do.
Ugh.
What am I doing.

I’ve got so much to learn,
I have so much I yearn
For
But I can’t have everything
I’m better off with nothing
Than everything.

Being real is scary
Because I am scary
And it’s scary to scare someone else
With just real me
Because truth strikes fear
Into the ignorant
And I am still ignorant
Of many things.

Good things must end too quickly
And bad things must prolong themselves.

It’s hard to see the light when you are blind.

I don’t understand
Where you stand.
Are you on my side?
I don’t like being lied
To.

She’s on top of the world
But she’s up there all alone.
She’s a goddess disguised
But her feet can’t find the ground
Anymore.

If you
Read her face you’ll see
The seasons never show.
Not new,
It’s a makeup routine for the ages
And no, no nobody knows the way
She’ll change into stone.

Vague as it seems
My whimsical means
Of writing seems
To be working for me.

I’ve been down in the dumps
Been up in the sky
I’ve written about being stumped
And I’ve written of lies.

I’ve written of rhymes
And I’ve written of soul
Thank goodness my ideas aren’t drawn from a pool
I would’ve been dry by then!

Why do I dare to sing
this melody, overused and
claimed by millions of
others, with voices nearly
interchangeable but barely off,
imperceptibly so, just a dash
too much of cinnamon, not that
you’d ever know, but still
I steal these hand-me-down
words, chasing the horizon only
to retreat back to the
well-worn reef?

You think you’re gonna save me
But all you do is harm.
Sugar-coated words
Mean nothing to me.
Because sugar-coated words
Are coated in venom, not sugar.
You say you don’t want to,
But I’m not sure.
If you didn’t want to hurt me,
You wouldn’t.
You’re starting to become a Predator,
Your composure is fading away.
Your armor of lies is breaking,
And my defenses are disintegrating.

When I was kid,
I’d look up at the sky and wave
At the airplanes passing by,
I’d wave down from an airplane
Hung up high,
I’d wave and think myself seen.
I remember being seven years old and
The hot air balloon operator said
To keep all limbs inside the vehicle
And my parents kept nudging me to the middle–
Safe and nested.
But I didn’t stay there for long, no
I pushed out to the edge, on tiptoes to
Look down at the great big
Everything.
Only half the thrill is fear of falling.
The rest is how it feels to float.

There is a God
But he ain’t showing himself
Why is he letting his “great power”
Rot on the shelf?

My faith is waning
My awe is fading
It’s too loud
Too big of a crowd
Looking for peace
But that hasn’t happened.

Where the frick did you go?
Why did you leave
When I needed you the most?
If you’re really there
Show yourself
Come back.

I don’t want
People to gravitate
Towards me
Like moths to a fire
Like light to a black hole.

I want people to come to me
Because I am happy
And they are too.

This dog is warm
Pleasedon’tmovePleasedon’tmovePleasedon’tmove
Gosh dang it he woke up!

they never **** the main character.

but i am not the main character.

i am replaceable like batteries,
only useful for some time,
never really necessary, just nice
to have around.

but i know that i did this to myself.

people never care about a character
without flaws.
and i made sure not to burden everyone else
with my pain and my worries and failures.
i made sure to not need them
and now they do not need me.

i managed to avoid vulnerability
and i managed to avoid closeness
and i managed to avoid potential damage
only to waste away.

Up to 60% of the human body is water.
I must have much more than that,
Because it keeps on leaking
Out of my eyes.

I am water
You are ice.
You freeze me to the bone.
Even when I’m right next to me,
You make me feel alone.

I’m a waterfall,
A stream of words,
Unreliably flooding
Just to dry up at the first sign of drought.

it comes and goes like waves,
she said to me.
it’s okay, one day, it’ll go away,
she said to me.
the ocean never stays the same, you know,
she said to me.
if that great, big body of water can change,
so can you,
she said to me.

i love you,
i said to her.

Sadness
Is often seen
In blue colors.
Tears
Are blue
They are made of water
And salt
They taste like the sea.
The sea
Comes in waves
And so does
Pain.

W̳ell I guess my
E̳xistence is just a collection of pride
A̳nd failures that I cannot
K̳eep tolerating

I strain to chase my own inspiration
But ev’ry day there’s only artifacts
From my past eras, this lonely creation
Takes every fleeting feeling like a fact.

I seek, I seek, but rarely do I find
The abstract answer I was looking for;
You’d think you can’t get lost inside your mind
But sometimes you don’t own the parts you store.

It truly is a pit without a bottom
To stare the depths that lie within your heart
Because we underestimate the *****’s
Ability to turn pain into art.

Although it may appear to be a void
A writer’s well of words can’t be destroyed.

No, I won’t stress myself to the point where I start breaking down and getting mad and making everyone else’s day ****.
Too late.

We poets
Are very dramatic.
Rose colored glasses
Could be our logo.
Life is never just life,
But is this entire story that just HAS to be written.
We write
Like it’s the only thing
Keeping us alive,
A ring buoy
In a torrential sea, wave after wave.
Our need to express
Is so intense
That sometimes we make up stuff
Because reality fails to offer
The inspiration we desperately need.
We are dramatic.
We are creative.
We can sometimes be exhausting
And overly excited
And sometimes
We may embellish
Just a little bit.
But most of all,
We poets are freakin’ awesome!

Evil and good is based on perspective
But I know that you are not even close to evil

You might be afraid I might leave you
But I won’t, I won’t, I won’t

Happiness is hard to get and even harder to keep
But you are it, and I won’t leave you

The world may be scary and sad
But I am here, and we will be okay

We may not be okay
But it will happen
Someday

Meanwhile
Accept your demons
And accept yourself
While you still have to deal with them

You stand stoic
Unemotional
Uncomplaining
Your face is a rock.

Your eyes bore into
My misty spheres
I wish I knew how
To not feel.

I can’t

Betrayal, lies and fire
All gather and conspire
None of them ever tire
In the game to ruin me.

All is dark where light go dies
Rotting flesh and buzzing flies
Acid rain and burnt-red skies
In the place where evil resides.

A hell all inside a person
Where the adversary would be found spittin’ and cursin’
Several demons mix up a death potion
A sea of red, a burgundy ocean.

Oh, and I mustn’t forget
This is the place your personality is set.

What is love?
If I may ask.
Is it butterflies
When they walk past?
Is it warmth that seeps
To your fingertips
When they gift you
With a soft gentle kiss?
Is it the trust
That gives you comfort
Or the peace that they give you
That you only used to have in slumber?
Is it the bond that you share
That can’t ever tear?
Is it dying for the one you live for?
What is love?
If I may ask.

When she tells you
That the universe is fair.
And that all people
Do really care.
If she believes
That things are fine
And that the world
Is nice and honest
And that people never lie.

Do you tell her
That she’s wrong?
How can you lie straight to her face
And say she’s right where she belongs?
Or do you tell her
That she’s right
And things will change and get better
As long as we fight?
What do you tell her?

Who’s gonna tell her?

What younger me would say to me:
“I wanna see the sea!”
“Do you have a dog?”
“You should get a dog.”
I have four, by the way.
“Have you ever ridden a horse?”
I have. Still obsessed, of course.
“Is middle school like, super hard?”
No, but work hard, and you’ll earn a reward!
“Do you mean I’ll get candy or something?”
No, but you’ll get lots of satisfaction.
“What’s satisfaction.”
Oh you’ll see when you’re older.
“Teenagers ****.”
I won’t deny it!

Snow brings a new start.
Each day is novel.
Rain washes off tears.
Weather makes anew.

It’s hard to see green grass
When it’s snowing.

It’s hard to see the positive
When you are positive
The world is going to heck.

It’s really dang hard
To see the sun
On a foggy day.

But you dang well know
I will try anyway.

Moving fast
Through my day
I won’t slow down
Catch up to me.
I am a tornado
I am a flame
A hurricane
Of business.
——————————————-
Slow down
Be at peace
This life was never
A race to the end.
I am a snow flake,
Drifting down
Take my time
Before I hit the ground.

Where are you
When I need you?

Longing
For
Something
I
Will
Never
Have.

So
Obscure
I
Don’t
Even
Know
What
I’m
Looking
For.

Where are you?

I used to be able to
Sit at random tables
And introduce myself
Like it was nothing.

I used to have
Confidence.
Enough to stride
Into every situation
With optimism
And tenacity.

I’ve changed in many ways
Some good, some bad.
But this is one thing
I’d like to have back.