Let's get one thing straight
You don't know me  
Nothing about me
So you cannot miss me and please Mizz me with the dumbfauqery
Of you loving me because your
Wordz are more lymp
Than your aktionz!

Haven't told you
I loved you in days
Not even past
Our hunny mooning phase
You have know idea
How peaceful you rest
You think
I have no clue
You admire
The way I sleep too
Passionate thoughts
Of far longer than
A few forevermores
And beyond death
With you and only you
Nam Mi Corazon!

Know my faceless name
I'm coming for my fortunes
Might let you keep your fame
Your forty acres
And that stubbornly mule
Strangly hanging fruits
Diamond mynded,purest goalz
Adam anti um
Killing healing zoulz...

Coming for my mind
Didn't plan on
Running into me
Allow the illumination
Of proverbial foolishness
This Goddezz on da ryze
Look beyond my eyez
Respekt this Monalyza'z Smilez...

Never hate or hated you
Mostly hurt turned anger
From betrayal
Through the things you'd do
Secrets told you
That you had to tell
Caused lying to resort
Intentionally
We both hid it well.

Viktoriouz
Already won
You loose and lost
No battle scarred hands
Wearing clean gloves
Polished whole armour
Never dented, stained
Nor appearing worn
God's grace abides!
Only one pair of footprints
To be found!!!

What I want is irrelevant to you
What I need is paramountly
Conducive to my peace of mind
This ghetto, ratchet, chaotic
Way you choose to exist, Is sooo
Beneath the way I live my life
I cannot be who you want or need
Not when all you seem to be doing
Is wasting your life, and my very
Precious nonrefundable time...

Focusing on the
Next level constantly
Being grateful
For the current path
Of life's journeys
Humbly blessed
This one life gifted me
Pressing toward a mark
Only I need, see...

Did I conjure you
Were you a delusion
Did your love not exist
Was it all a creation in my mind
Did WE not lay head to chest
Never eating soggy anything
Let alone waffles at our worsts
Best WE ever had
We loved you the most
Let you in to our inner sanctum's
Deepest parts, our existentialism
Did WE not bear, carry, and birth
Where truthful lies did hurt
Honesty's unforgiving sting
Was none of it really the truth
You could've just gotten
What you initially came for
You didn't have to pretend
Cause watching your act
Way back when is what
Made me and kept me
Slipping, Tripping, and Falling
For the illusion you gave of you.

Methodical plan of escaping
Far away from this painful
Pruning.
Bruiser battered ego
No room at any inn
For wounded zoulderz
Impeccable smouldering
Behind evil eyez
Giddily welcoming innocence
Far more organized than I
This den of joy thieves.

The problem is
I talk far too much
Saying anything and everything
To any and everyone
Knowing I couldn't
Count on any platform
To just vent
And juzt be listened to
I don't trust myselves
With Me
I just knew
I shouldn't have tried to
Trust myself with you...

In your eyes
I am chosen to be loved
A delightful apple
Seen carved in
The palm of your hands
So why do I see myself
As a waste of God's time
When will I stop
Listening to the father of lies
And learn to see myself
In your eyes...

I need a muse like yesterday
You have no idea
My trainz of thoughtz keep taking
Off without me
I need a muse like yesterday...

Can't part
With my mind, soul, and spirit
Just yet
Still need
My guide
To come pass
Flying, walking, swimming
Could care lesser than less
Just get here
Juztuz been calling uz
To rest in pieceful reztz...

Learning to learn
Enough
From decisions
The first time
They yield unnecessary
Unfavorable outcomes...

When have WE
Ever! At anytime
Crossed the barriers
Of each other's mindz
Waking to the cold
Sweat of my own browz
Missing the warmth
From your side of the bed
Wanting to get to you
By any mode
Of transportation necessary
With this ring this bestest friend
Putz Da Zhe in Wifey...

No sane person
Wants to invest
In someone, who
Does not invest
In themselves!!!

Golden queendom
Proudly shining
Melinated jewels
Dropping gems
Tireless examples
I'm not responsible
For what you may
Or may not believe
It's simple, really!
Doing my bestest
To get some of this life right...
Concerned with ongle my ****** ****
Is Dat aiight?

Walked around
Smelling shitay
For hours
Didn't realize
Attached to the
Soul of my shoes
That repugnant stench
Trailing me was you.
Ugh toxicity'$ disdain
That thin line is no divide
Double dotted you multiplied
Hateful thoughts of you
That once regarded our loathsome
Love so muthafauqin high...

It's just your presence
It reminded me of less stressful
Far less complicated times
It really is just your presence
That brought these tears
And the joy of thinking back
On the nieve innocent blasts
We've had throughout
Not ever wanting to grow up
Those KB, ToyzRUZ  kids Yesteryearz...

Everytime I allow
Myself to let go
Interesting non happenstances
Always seem to occur
Everytime I let her out
Eorshnarfitiz can't get
From up under those
Bright sunny daze or
The silver lining of
Every gray,  natural days cloud.

Go please
Please leave me
Exactly the fuxed up way
You found me
Please I'm pleading
And begging please
Don't think my kind
As stupid or weak
Please love me
Or just let me be
Answers to prayers
Playing hide N seek
Rabbyt Whole deep
Muthafauqerz
Laughing at me
Praying I'm brought
To my knees
Got no clue
No chanting mics
Already there
Praying beyond prayers
Genuinely Lovingly
Accept me for all of me
Or Zimply! Juzt let me be.

Hate me for
Who I've genuinely
Been to and for you
All the requests of your heart
Fulfilled by yours truly
Simply because I gave half of
f a u q
About what anybody else thinks they think or know about me whether from somebody else's mouth or my own Conversation's verbiaging trajectory!
Even your opinions of me are tainted
Who are you really?  You are not my Artist nor my art that I've chosen for
To be painted of me...

Just to get out
Holding my breath from
This detrimental fresh air
Inhaling toxicities at
Anaphylactic proportions
When your suicidal thoughts
Are delusions of setting you free
Don't believe the hype through
Golden plated fronts
Weather we live or die
Somewhere every 24hrs
The sun has the ability
To rise and shine or not
And your skies can still be
Any shade of greyish blue you so choose

I'm so broken
The shattered peacez
Of my soul hurt so good
Because when the clouds fade
I will be better for choosing
To choose the God in me
That first chose ME!!!

The bottom of this world's
Barrel is far more crowded
Than could ever be imagined
Naysayers, back biters and
A whole lot of needy crab *******
No mothers no fathers to teach
Or show them better, has made
Most ***** in this barrel's peripheral
Shorter! Finding a way out gets one
Pulled down faster and harder.
So I've decided to tunnel through
From the bottom of this bottomless
Barrel that has tried to keep us under!

May I
Be worthy enough
To hide myself
In your peace
Far longer than
Just this moment
May I
Sojourn in your zoul
Far beyond just
This lifetime
Bmyndz far longer lifelines
May I
Stay just a while
To, by all means
Let the sweet smelling
Savorings linger
Only minds know
Where brains master plan
Is hidden pinky
Learn to love yourself
May I
Let you be you? Of course
As long as you let me be me

Facade you say
Interesting choice of words
Since you know about pretentious
Pretendingz very well
Acting like you gave a fauq
To get what you want
Sending your PR rep
Like that wasn't your game
You know that hustlin backwards
The muthafauqin front
Trust me, what lies beneath the lies
I am far more stupid than she
Who tried so hard to warn me
For whatever their in or
Unintentional reasoningz
I had to see for myself
The real you, you couldn't
Keep hiding akumatizing
Through wordz who I see
Then again believing
Usually iz, resting in
Pieces of Peace!!!

I can't show you
How heavy my heart is
Not even in theory
You could know the truth
How I cry so much
My tear ducts swell
With much more
Than regretful tears
Mourning choices
That could've yielded
Far better results
Than the ramifications
Left with of not loving me enough
To recognize and run from
Fauqed up unrequited love...

How many ways are you
Ready and willing to love
Still waters of an inferno zoul
Volcanic ash reigning your entire world
Melting glacial iceberg smiles
Bedding venomous skorpyonz
Waking in Pheonix'z eagled eyez
Mmmmmmm such a tazty morsel...

Rearranging the thoughts in my mind
Remembering back to a Time Before I was angry and hurt
Hatefully hating me
Blaming myself rather than
Accept I couldn't change
What was done
Before I knew the  many ways
My heart could probably break
Or what my soul could take Rearranging thoughts in my head
Trying not to break
Around every mental bend...

Most High!
Forgive me for putting
Anyone and or anything
Above my relationship with you
It's not always easy
To completely trust and depend
Solely on you
Help me follow your lead
Like I expect my gems to even when
They are afraid and confused
About what's going to happen next
Help me to never again look back
To never again place anything or anyone
On the seat of the throne of my heart
All I am and will be, belongs to only you
Thank you for your love and forgiveness
For your promises over mine and all
Attached to me lives! Not my will
But yours for my life! I'm grateful. Amen!

GoddezzPPR!!!

Where do the skeletonz
In my closet go to hide
When I'm the one
Constantly opening the door
That illuminates them
Assuming credences
In confidence
What really lies in lies

You honestly think
I don't know how
To get rid of you
If I truly want
To be done with you?
Sadly mistaken
Unless I allow
You will never
Know the truth
And nothing but boo...

When this darkness
Comes over me
It takes me to
A lonely place where
I'm in a full room
Standing all alone
No empty seats
Barely walking space
No familiar face
No family to call home
No heart full of love
No one to belong to
Tricking for affections
All strays can do is roam...

Adonis set trippin
Drunkin grownups
Turning tables in so many
Knowingly unknown wayz
Testing broken pressured
Pipelining crewz found no leakz
Glasses raised to pouringz only
No shoveling plowz
To loosen hazy snowy memories
Rocking and rolling through
Uneighborly hoods
Murdering unfriendly shipz
Clicking threes just might
Not get you home court advantage
How far iz to far,but wait!  
Who gon clean up this dog ****?
Of that *** phase, if not you?

I am so lost
Can you help
Me please find
My puzzled peacez

Every **** time
I find my sunglasses
I loose them again
Simply because
They were cleverly acquired
They really were never mine
Purchased possession
Every single summer
Ugh every **** time

P.S I keep promising to replace them

I am no gi jane
Once you're finished playing
I end up in a disheveled
Mentally emotional toy box
Or placed neatly on a trinket'z
Zhelf! I know who and who's I am
What's in my name
My lineage and my birthright'$
One in the same
I dare you to try to define me
Oh please go ahead, make my day
Just try to tell me about the I
That loves me for simply
Being my fearfully and Wonderfully created selves!!!

Lord search my heart
Show me how to
Overcome  this hurtful
Angry disgraceful shame
Caused and allowed
Only by my disobedience
I take responsibility
Rather than placing blame
Be the lifter up of my head
Renew my passions for
What is right just and holy in your sight
Please Most High if you see fit
Reestablish  and restore
My place at the foot of the
Throne of Grace
Hold me in the palm of your hands
Only in your love
I find the only true hiding place...

Failure is not
The only option
One can choose
Succeeding is an option too...

My life is in your hands
And you are playing
A dangerous game
On the throne of
My one and only heart
Not trying to be
Disrespectful at all
Just inquiring master
If I was born for
Any particular
Reason at ALL
The questions I question
Have?motives attached
To the mental frame of
A most earnest prayer
Because I really believe
In the powers of the name...

Needingly wanting
Longing better for myself
No welfare lines
No astronomical wealth
No ***** births
Ex husband and baby daddy hell
No miscarried away
No praying to die
Just to get away
No mental holds
Finding my mind
Unbreakable as I am
I will get to my better life...

So we drowned ourselves
Induced copulationz
Grown drunkyn highness  
******* to our senses
At klimaxed peakz
Trying to figure out what the foch We been doing all this time
You don't even like my body
I don't even love your mind.
Awakening epiphanies
Saved a lifetimez
Repeating lust'$
Hate cycles of unrelated
Uncontrollable unrequited luvz.

People only
Treat you
How you allow
Teach me how
To love you
When you
Learn how
To luv2love Your  Truthz!

Cries for help
Healing and good health
Overcoming still from my past
Being prepared to last
And outlast
Gracefully being guided
To my purposeful purpose...

Dey say I'm krazi
I've given
Far too many fauqz
And even that
Have been my
Muthafauqin prerogativez