this is how you take land, you **** its people and run pr
you tell them "they do not starve" when most of the bowls are empty

Did I loose my funny bone?
maybe I need a new one
or did I break it
in that case will the pieces shake and rattle as I move ?

I need your help dear but you do not reach out to offer it

On some mornings I wake from a dream of you
and there is so much longing that my words cannot express it
my entire body feels tender like the skin that grows after a burn
pink, sensitive and vulnerable

During days like these the thought of you does more than tingle through me
it sits over me and for a few minutes I can move without acknowledging it

What are you under the sunlight
when the day reveals you to the world

how do you smile in the early hours of the morning as you let the the whispers of grace guide you and the thoughts of gratitude fill you

who are you when you do not pretend
when you are at peace with who you are

For some this is just an election but for me this a marathon
a marathon I will be running my entire life

saving the image of USA will not diminish the number of people who voted to re-elect someone who openly flamed racism’s fire

May I never lose my hope
even if all else crumbles
May I never forget that my joy is something I cultivate
May I understand that if I am not the caretaker of my own happiness no one in this lifetime will assume this role

I am grateful for the morning sun that awakens me through the window
it’s warm light brings me joy
I am grateful that I am endlessly strong
and loved
I am grateful that every year life takes me where I want to, no matter the outcomes
How magical is it that all I set forth comes back to me
That no love is too small or wasted
That there are no words uttered that go unheard
and no prayer unanswered
it is a matter of closing your eyes and listening


I am grateful for this small, fragile lump of mass, and this lifetime

Bless this earth and the people that feed you
The sun that bathes you in light
Bless all teachers that labor with love

Bless this very moment that holds you
How I love you , even as time goes on

Bless the continuation of all their wisdom
because it all amounts to love

To love we kneel And grasp in awe at how it holds up the planets and the stars

Failing in the wind you were more than that
what the spark of you
ever present my women you bore a belt of bullets

and if I were to tell people I come from women who bore guns who fought in revolutions
a lovely Adelita
my lovely great aunt

how wild a heart
How strange a women they would  think  you were
What choice did you have but to sing a song of rebellion and to sing a song of war
I am  lucky that I get to be gentle and sweet
Drunk walking back from a bar
Having drank  a whole bottle of Chardonnay with friend whose family lived through war and moved out of Sierra Leon

How lucky I am to be able to have the option to be gentle and loving

Great aunt, we are of the same tree

you are a stream that flows
and I no longer ask why
you flow in that direction

Open fields
just look out on the open fields
What else do you need

The swirling butterflies
in autumn begin to disappear
but they will come again
with the whirl of spring

Look out calmly upon open fields
each direction speaks of endlessness
takes the tongue of spirit and soothes


opportunity is here , healing is here
in this open field you meet yourself

For me there is was only love I wanted to give
everytime it felt easy
natural to give
that was all
all I intended to do
and when I held my hand out
there was nothing
except the wind that blew
and I knew your hand wasn’t for me or else it would of decided to reach out too

I do not regret a thing
you mean that much to me
that I would take the leap again even if I got a do over
I mean so much to myself, I would give myself the opportunity to go after what made my heart sing

The salesman stood in front of the poet and tried to sell her words
what a sight

Come to me gentle hands
smile and sprinkle laughter over me
I need soulful remedies
smooth me

I came here for me
and I came this way for you
that was all

for the things that have the greatest meaning
take the biggest leaps of courage

Find my hands in the water of the graces that do align

There is one green mat by the window
my brother, my mother and I use it

Behind it is a window with a old red pine
i watch its needles under the evening light

each of us arriving on the rubber surface for a need to stretch the body and the heart

you walk
no matter the direction
this dream
      never changes much
they put their foreheads
to yours And smile

in some they are wolves
that sleep at your side

in others travelers
that gather
with you in the forest

in others they
   point toward a tiger
lurking in your chest

you walk
        and they protect
nothing is wild

        (not even a dream)

When I smile there are beautiful lines under my eyes
and I do not want to hide them

I bear with great joy this life of mine

It is just that I want to continue to grow
throughout the entirety of my life even when it hard
it just that I don’t want to abandon myself
or stand in my own way
I just want to try consistently until I leave this form
I just just want be truer to myself and love deeply this precious, precious life
I would never jump ship I am committed in the small things which are truly the core of all of me

For all my lives lived and lost
I cry for none of them

for now in understand
What a gift this mystery is

for all my lives lived
I am thankful for each of them

A turtle dove brings its wings into its sides and dips
beginning it’s a descent into the air below it

like a seasoned diver with great confidence
gliding through the blue

Maybe for some people love quantified by the things your give them or the physical proximity of you to them, what will they do once you die ? Will they think you have stopped loving them?  

Can they feel the world? The way in which birds feel the air currents while defying gravitational law

Are they aware that nothing truly dies?

I seek peace and reconciliation
everything else:
the silence
the arguing
the finger pointing
the largest vine extending from the past to a future I project I cut

Pruning this life from all stories, no past, no future only this spacious garden of presence that I hold it all

Elizabeth Fraser sings me angelic tunes through the speaker and I become a circling girl.

I do not want to keep crossing lines people draw for me

So when my stupid heart want to run passed the painted line I now pull it back

I am not in-charge of redrawing that line
someone else is , the person who put it there is in charge of that

so I hold it, I hold this wild heart and comfort it
at least I am strong to comfort it now

and yes some part of me really wants to be there but there is that line

and I sink back down a little
and sink because I just don’t want to cross anything anymore
I want to feel to roam in someone’s garden
when I am invited
I do not want to invite myself when no one else has

I will pick up the whispers over the dry patches of land amongst the chaparral

the womxn who births over the earth in a dense city bears the name of “mother” when I call out

The long fabric roll unfolds her story and the those of the ones she calls “brother” and “nana”. Crafty hands and animal loving eyes set to see the sunrise over the North American sky reflect its light over the railroad fabric and back into my eyes

I pick up the radio waves, the ones my cousins, my friends, my sibling and my grandparents heard as they serenaded each other or played music in the living room . It was always static I could never make it out. Buzz. Buzz. Buzz

A static buzz was all I could hear for a very long time.

Then the two bars of 8 beats for salsa; the 4/4 ballads I always giggled and stumbled my way through at parties when the old folks got up to dance, and I would grab my one of my best friends and give it a go

the endless ways in which I was taught to feel the world around me, to weave myself into the music, into words, into this earth and into light begins to carry me through hard seasons,
and I understand now if life is meaningless, If I am only an irrelevant speck in this cosmic ocean the best “****  you” the ultimate undoing of this
is to live a life of meaning, and burn bright and authentically until there is nothing left and this existence is enough

(in truth it has always been enough)

Soy poeta disfrazada con una arcoíris
soy energía colorida
riza contagiosa
y amó los sonidos raros
y beso a la música alta por traerme placer

I gave it all I could muster with all my strength I dared
will all the might I could call upon I came
with all reserves of courage
with everything I am
with no tear withheld with shakey hands
but I came

You come like a warm breeze
on the shortest month
and if I could pick a birthday gift
it would of never amounted to anything as precious as your forgiveness
what you give could never be bought
and I am aware of that

Quiero leer la literatura de la onda
quiero asomarme en otro mundo

The evening prepares to fully gulp
the sun, the car engines zoom contorting the sound scape and twisting gravel into their menacing rubber wheels

I am Jane loving Austen
Purring with her own happiness in there solidarity home

I am flower moving in the wind
feeling it’s conjures that life is indeed cyclical and you should sway to its wind

I am happy to be who I am
every single sorrowful thing, and every small glorious moment swirls in communion

I am happy
just happy

Today I changed my agreement with the world
and I am willing to become what I want to see more of
I am willing to not just to fly low, but soar
I am noting afraid of not landing over land
I am strong enough to land
I am wise enough to know I am not the flying, the altitude or in any way extraordinary  
I know I am ordinary
and I know deep down who I really am
and so we begin arms open

I halt my jogging to stare at the moon

I forget the moon is a floating rock  is suspended in space
how marvelous everytime I remember

I see clearly
who I am in the mirror
where I excel and what I lack
I writhed and I cried
and burned
and ran like a wolf alone in the forest
awoke next to a lake
fur still damp
but to the water I turned my gaze
and I could finally recognize who I was

humbled by the moon and its giving light
I stood there shivering and out of my mouth spilled the courage to howl

and the wind accepted my offering and carried it off

This is where I start
I see my humaneness,
my everythingness, my interbeing
and so I your blurry figure comes into focus
and you are just another human

the kind who stand in front mirrors
writhe, cry, burn,are reborn and
run like a wolf
until you howl out too
to the greater in humbleness





I am back to my being
and you can call me by my real name
the one we share

Do not worry
all becomes lost in that ocean of thought today just feel the wind and sun
your nature is that of calm

I rise to a radiant sun and you are first on my mind.
You are too wide and expansive that I cannot write anything close to what I would like to tell you. All of them are tiny icebergs that can’t get close enough to the truth.
the truth of how so deeply I care for you
even after all this time

these icebergs
if you bump into them I hope you would recognize
my affection runs deep
always hidden below the surface and always ever-present

Still the softest part of me waits for you
its too hazy and I am too confused

heal under the trees
no harm to anything
calm
like all things under the sun
I am a temporary thing
smooth my being
lull me with your singing
...
She would sing to me
all the time
she loved to chirp like the little birds
that would land on her pomegranate trees

even on her wheelchair she’d find a song with my name in it and sing “mi Lupita”

Cloudy weather cloudy mind

More practice is needed
I cannot let my thoughts run me over

What we were yesterday falls away today
the mascara dripping under the shower head
the introduction to said mascara, the time our a best friend brushed our lashes
not one by three times claiming somehow that would make them nicer

owning things
Being “__” because it matters

Matter for what reason?

all the yesterday’s fall away no image
worthy of being clung to

all can fall away
and what remains below is what can never go

Be still waters
do not be late day break
be with me dear beloved
as I make my way through the day

May there be more room for joy
and more room for fulfillment
May there be surprises that raise the spirits high
May there be years that take your breath away while watching the sun fall below the skyline and set

“I am not going to be salty; I going to be sugar” that’s my motto for the day. :)

I want to travel São Paulo
and Oaxaca with you, since you have already been to Mexico City.

I want to be better at seeing the world through your eyes too

I love you genteelly
like the flapping of a birds’ wings
turns into a whisper at night

I love you genteelly
like the water that calmly flows
down the brook through the thicket
and over pebbles

Lovely girl there in your twirl is your magical way of spinning without care
you create more beauty to add to this world

I always waited for them to be sure of me
the way a weatherman is sure about the forecast, before I decided to settle in a certain country or city
and perhaps they waited for me to decide to stay before they were sure of me
but what is never asked or addressed never can be transformed