there are things you were counting on,
out there, weren't there,
things you thought that you knew,
things that were not there,
are not there, never were there,
things that just would not do,
so you turn up the volume,
invent you some things,
things that you'd like to be true
and you conjure, and pause,
and give cause to the clause
that says anything goes; it is true

Loving too much and too often
Yields unexpected results
I tried to love everyone
Ended up falling apart
For they knew I was open
24/7
To tickle their eardrums
And flatter their hearts
I always gave love
Yet didn't received it
They took it for granted
Or didn't believe it
I took what was golden
And made it so common
From platinum to copper
Stretching it thin
When I ran out
The sorrow began
Now I live with the shame
That I don't understand

I am Woman that is certain
But what makes me unique
Join me on this journey as I peel away the layers and look further than skin deep

I AM Wife and Lover
I AM Mother and Grandmother
I AM Daughter and Sister
I AM Aunty and Niece
I AM Goddaughter and Godmother

I AM Runner and Walker
I AM Listener and Talker
I AM Reader and Writer
I AM Settler and Traveller

I AM Serious and Funny
I AM Sociable and Discreet
I AM Reliable and Dependable
I AM Cold and Heat

I AM Fun and Loving
I AM Kind and Giving
I AM Generous and Mean
I AM Nervous and Calm

I AM Supportive and Demanding
I AM Giver and Taker
I AM Lover and Fighter
I AM Adventurous and Squeamish

I AM Slow and Fast
I AM the Future and the Past
I AM Classless and Class
I AM Familiar and Unique

I AM **** and Desirable
I AM Small and Curvy
I AM Smart and Sassy
I AM Happy and Sad

I AM Rich and Poor
I AM Foolish and Wise
I AM Lucky and UnLucky
I AM Courageous and Weak

I AM the sum of all my parts, I AM ME from my skin to my heart.

Who are you?

The devil and I
Are saying goodbye
We’re calling it a day,
Life’s gone colourless
Life’s gone grey
Me and the devil
Have nothing to say.
The world spins
Around my ego
No halo on my head
Our relationship
Is so
pleasingly dead.
I’m of to pastures knew
Holding my hand didn’t
Know what to do
Guess what inside
another
Devil grew,
This Devil inside
Ruined all my fun
With catastrophic
Outcome
Blew my
head of
With his
own gun.
The devil and I
have
said our
Last goodbyes.

I lie
and
I lie
and
I lie

I hide my behavior
to keep you safe.

I keep quiet
not to offend you.

I agree with you
to keep you happy.

I walk on eggshells
for you and
it’s never enough.

I lie
and
I lie
and
I lie

but when the truth
arrives at that
final moment;

jaws will drop
plates will shatter
dogs will growl

and
you’ll be long gone
after seeing what
a ghastly beast
I am

but for now

I lie
and
I lie
and
I lie

to keep us
together.

Attracted to the broken
Like myself
I yearn to be fixed
To make amends
To feel once again
To wake up to my favorite person at my side
It’s not in the cards for me
And it wasn’t for you
So broken
No matter the repairs
I’ll never feel like new
Find me in a thrift store
Along with the other gems
Marked down due to being used

I'm not heartless, I've just learned to use my heart less