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A raw day
New and chaste
Like an unveiled bird cage
I am winged with bright eyes
A clean journal open to possibilities
You have scoured the rust from my heart
Leaving it a fresh, bleeding abrasion
That delightful hurt
Like cold hands thawing
Reminding me that I am still alive
You should have listened
When I said I wanted out
When I told you about the things in my head
When I said I was better off dead
You should have listened
When I said I needed someone
But I'm not blaming you for this
Don't get me wrong
You should have listened
At 3am when I was sobbing in my room
And you were sleeping peacefully
You should have listened
When I said that I loved you
The humble crack in my voice
Like it's the last chance for me to be true
But will you listen?
When I'm lonely and it's cold
And I need someone to protect me
This life is growing old
And if you listen
And give me a reason to stay
Then I promise you you won't regret this
I'm here when you feel this way.
I'm
     NEVER
  Gonna
          Allow

    Men
           To
      Put

              Me
     D
         O
           W
         N


*Again
Number 4 in my series of truths. Click #mytruths to read them all. :)
Suspend the moon from golden anchors
Hide your notes on doing time
Halos tarnish in secret places
Ain't no such thing as  a victimless crime
Concrete held me like a lover
Tucked me into a metal bed
And I could fill the oceans in my heart
With all the hatred that I've bled
I gave the rage too much control
Forgot all about the cold hard facts
Like "boy once you squeeze the trigger..."
"You can't get the bullets back"
Some say "hell you should have killed em"
I guess that depends on who you ask
One thing I'm certain of these days
The answer ain't hiding in a whiskey flask
Spent a lot of time thinking things over
Ran to the edge of suicide and back
I ran the gamut of emotions
I went from blue to carbon black
But I found out just who I'd been hating
I saw my reflection and he was looking back
So I came home a bit too much to look at
teardrop tattoo underneath my eye
Skull and crossbones on my neck
With the words "Hell raiser till I die"
But this single story don't define me
This doesn't tell you who I am
A Minister who's got a background
Don't think for a minute that I'm "less than"
Let's see if I've anything to offer
They say it never hurts to try
Anyone who's ever known me
Knows I can't just lay down and die
I wonder how long it's gonna take
Will time go slow or will it go fast
How far must I go into the future
Before I outrun my past
dad left
for his second tour of duty
on my third birthday

mom kept
a jar full of jelly beans
on the living room coffee table

every night
she gave me one to eat, saying
"when these jelly beans
are all eaten up,
dad will come back home"

sometimes
i would sneak another,
to help dad come home sooner

one night
the phone rang
and i watched mom
wipe away a tear
as she filled
the jar
back
up
On this Remembrance Day, I think of all those who have served, with a special thought for Dad.  And though she has no medals, I also think of Mom; every tour of duty Dad went through, she went through too, taking care of us on her own.

*** Edit: Thank you for all your kind words!  Due to a recent outpouring of sympathy, I feel it necessary to clear up the fact that my dad did in fact make it home from this mission; his tour had simply been extended for an additional 3 months.  Still, it isn't easy being part of a military family - and that's what I meant to show. ***
  Nov 2014 Franklin Richards
Just Melz
I keep digging and digging and digging,
     trying to dig myself out of this hole
But it seems everything is collapsing around me
      burying me with my soul.
      This small shovel
  just doesn't seem to be enough,
     No one thought to tell me
         how life could be this rough
Now,
    I'm just getting deeper and deeper
        and deeper
    with my unwanted thoughts
This shall be my grave,
        but don't put any roses on top,
      I prefer **forget-me-nots
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