I have never been very good at this
I have never been good at
Trusting

Pull my hair
Kiss me again

You aren't in love with me
But you love the way I feel
At night
Our sweat clinging to our foreheads

I want to just gaze in your eyes
And watch them twinkle
While I make you feel
Good
About yourself

About your smile
And about your laugh
About your whispers
And gentle caresses

Your the one who stays up with me
Even though we both
needed to be asleep hours ago

The one who dances with me
when I'm not feeling like breathing
And makes me remember how to live

You aren't in love with me
But you love how I feel
With my lips on your neck
And your hands on my hips
As our bodies move

I want to hold your hand
While you struggle through life
And pat you on your back
When you make it out alive

I never want to lose you

I never want to lose
The feeling of your smile
As you try to kiss me

Or your hands
guiding me through the motions

No, you aren't in love with me
But I know you love me

Wild and on the prowl, cannot, Will not attempt to stop.
Mind is set, target locked.
Speed, agility, and stamina, my mind has let everything go.
YOU are the only thing I know and I can already taste, hear, feel and smell you.
I am an animal releasing my energy.
Satisfyingly filling my stomach.
Thank goodness I pulled into the drive thru.
That burger was all I needed.

skin against skin in the purest way
i want to feel your hands on my face when you lean in to kiss me
and i want to feel your arms against mine when we hug and hold hands
and those brief fleeting moments when we do are not enough
if i could hold you in my arms for the day i swear i would and i finally understand why people invented cuddling
and no matter what you do or how you look,
you're just so intoxicating and beautiful
and even in a strangers perspective i bet they'd say the same
its like you're made out of ******* because you're so addicting but i can't give in because there's a sign you made that says "for recreational use only"

and I wonder if anyone else has thought what I've written about you,
because you aren't just the stars;
you're the sun and the moon too.

I'm addicted to you
And everything you do.
All the pain you put me through.

It's like a drug you put inside me.
Trying to keep me same
But instead your driving me insane.

I stayed up late last night
All because you started a fight.

I'm addicted to you
And everything you do.
All the paid you put me through.
It's all because I stay with you.

I hang on by every word you say.
As I inject you straight to my veins.

The way you kiss me.
The way you move your hands around me.
It's so seducing.
I can not help but wanting more.
Without you I can feel my withdraws.
Breaking all of the laws.

I'm addicted to you
And everything you do.
Even with all the pain you put me through.
I just cannot be without you.

The words of your mouth.
Hatred and anger.
The touch of your hand
Sends me a tingling sensation.

I keep going back to you.
Even though I say I am through with you.
As I inject you.
Withdrawls without you.
Is too much pain to handle.
I'd rather be with you.
Just hold my hand.
Please understand.

I'm addicted to you
And everything you do.
All the pain you put me through
I still come running back to you.

Maybe one day I'll stop breathing.
Maybe one day I'll stop feeling pain.
Maybe one day I'll find the answer to why but until then, here is where I lie.

I'm with a guy. He tends to hide and lie.
Who thinks it okay to kiss a *****, when he happens to be with me.
Oh by the way it is **** well cheating and this is the second time.
How many more times are you going to make my cry.

I know I'm not perfect.
I am quite far from that but why don't you notice the good and quit picking out my flaws.

I asked you why you are with me.
All you could say was I don't know.
Wow that just hurt me.

You don't see it.
You are blind.
You tell me everything is fine.
Why did you lie?

I can't take it anymore.
I don't deserve this.
I wanted to be treated with respect but no you'd rather check out other chicks.

You say I should be happy that you are looking and not touching.
That is a big fat lie.
You told a ***** you had a girlfriend  
Then you landed a passionate kiss.
Not caring how'd I feel.
Not seeing that I existed.

I know I have made mistakes.
Kissing a chick and grinding with two guys.
Don't worry I knew I was with you but I was looking for a good time.
You shouldn't be worried because you probably won't care.
You were too busy flirting and calling her your baby.
When I thought that was me.

The **** of you obsession is absolutely redundant.
That is more important to you than me.
Enjoy yourself while I am sleep.
I know that's when you decide to ******* because apparently I can not please.

When your not around I please myself.
I touch myself.
All you have to say is I knew I couldn't satisfy you.
Maybe now you see how I feel.

Looking at you and kissing you.
They are two different sides.
I am with you.
I can't believe you are mind but also I'm sick of this **** you do to me.
One more **** up and I'm through with you.

You have no heart like I.
So you should be fine and able to survive.

Peace.

Everyday I think of him,
Wishing we were together again.
I don't know why I want him back.
When all I want to do is hate him but I can't.

He put me through hell and pain with
al the drinking and partying he did.
I was very mislead.

He said " I love you and I'd do anything for you."
It was just a lie he wanted me to believe.
I knew this could never be real.

I knew I was in love with him.
There was a point where all we could do was fight.
That was the time I ****** up my life.

I felt ashamed.
I felt it was mine to blame.
All I could do was cry in pain.
I want to hate him but I just can't.

10 months of us being together.
I knew there was no turning back.
Everything was to its end.

Soon after that,
I was hurt pretty bad.
I was extremely mad.
I couldn't believe he had cheated on me.

I cried and I cried.
I was to the point I wish I had died.
I hate him.
I hate him.
I don't wish he was dead.
When the truth comes out.
I was completely mislead.
I was in love with this man.
No matter how much pain I was actually in.

Why can't I just hate him?

As I stare into the mirror I begin to ignore everything I hear. I start to wonder what the world would be like if I wasn't here. There are some days I just wanna disappear.

I'd have no pain and no more worries. No need for a selfish man. I'm pretty content with just my hand. No complications just a different feeling.

I'm tired of crying. Im tired of cutting. I'm tired of a man I thought I loved. I'd rather just chop his **** off.

I'm angry and ******. There's no one to turn to. My boyfriend lays next to me thinking I'm at rest. I feel the movement of his hand that can't stop touching his ****.

All he wants is for me to fall asleep so he can ******* to his stupid ******* and that's just something I can not Handle. Just one more time and ill ******* leave.

I'm hurting inside. Please just **** me or bury me alive. My cuts become more deeper my heart becomes weaker. I just want this all to stop. Please just end this reality. Pain is just much too deep.