I promise I’m trying my best not to back out
and I promise and I promise and I know that you’re okay with me being unsure
but it feels like I’m just a lost cause waiting for the inevitable day when you see
that this is it
this is all you’re getting from me
it feels like a lie though from day one you knew what you were getting into
and I tell you all the time that I can’t even figure myself out
and you offer to help me solve the puzzle but I don’t understand why you’re so willing
when I give you no guarantees
I guess you must love me
not weighing up the pros and cons like I do
you love unconditionally
like you're supposed to
and I can't help feeling like I'm not holding up my end of the deal
and even though I do all I can
I don’t think I'll ever feel the way that you do
is that enough for you?
hydrangea: frigidness, heartlessness, heartfelt gratitude for being understood