Never got to be a child had to be the man
Age nine and I was the only one that gave a ****
So ****** I handle my **** the best I can
Cause nothins been free except for dyin
So I've been cheatin, stealin, and lyin
Since I was a youngun its been survival
To charm and lie see everyone as a rival
In a game where its death if you get tabled
I ran the cards with sharks, waters chummed
Everyone smells blood so my hearts stone
It don't pump red it sits empty in the bone
I will never atone for what I've done
But I'll live to see the sun

A pack of monkeys throwing stones
Tribes of savages turn each other to bones
Gunpowder wizards usurp the world's throne
Imperial nations elevate off mass graves and wars won

Every face the same humans revealed their nature
Bared fangs base things and ******* masks hide a future
Monstrous acts with a spot of tea, putrid culture
Secede across the sea, manifest genocide and scalpers

Oh the humanity, where we swear fealty
To any who can make the biggest red sea
Sanity is subjective and as far as I can see
No animal will ever act logically

I've inflicted pain and I called down the rains
I did it in the name of the cause that I claim
So why do you exist, why do you do the same?
Everyone is the same we all have a cause to claim

Will we ever evolve past this point of no return
How do you teach a people who cannot learn
Truly this world is what humanity has earned
Blood and ash that won't last we all get our turn

3 missed calls sorry for never calling back
But I'm just the worst ghost in your past
I haunt those that loved me before I crashed

Am I dead to you yet?
I still remember when I held you as you wept
I remember crying about you when I slept

I don't have a reason to exist
My life is just broken promises
Broken dreams, broken things I list

I want to feel like I did at the dawn of day
But dusk has long since been on its way
Night of broken strings I tug and I fray
Thinking on the warmth of sun in yesterday
It never will rise again, I will never be okay

Mayday, mayday I'm swinging low
Into waves and crashing to and fro
A cosmic painting of emotion
Just another drop in the ocean
Blue abounds around me down I go

Can't tell up from right down from wrong
I thrash and fight as I get tugged along
Currents pull me with promise of holy
Belief will be your light, can't fool me
Angler fish in the void you won't eat me

I will grow purple and bloated like the royals of old
Waterlogged in darkness I float into the cold
Decay of flesh leave the bone soon I will be dead
I will be gone from the abyss but I never will have fled
Boldly I resided in the night drowning in the cold

My legacy will fade away seconds after I am gone
Nothing last in the colors of the night I have flown
In the colorless sky, a colorless soul never to be found
My whole being frays and I become unwound
Day never comes, the only son has set out on his own

Cut off some friends haven't been out in a week
They out to party like life isn't aboutta end
Say I'm paranoid, Say I oughta take a break
That's stupid, not sorry and I mean to offend

I get outta bed gas mask on the bedstand
Light up a match flag burned and trash canned
WW1 ain't **** to an anti-science fascist land
A rancid maggot-infested wonderland

Don't ******* tell me to chill cuz your blind
Eyes pecked out by shills now you just unwind
Your ironed out wrinkle-free smoothed out mind
Hunned K dead tell me what do you intend

With all this mask hatin and beach partyin
Blue suits over human life you ain't kiddin
Eat my **** and die this last year meant nothin
******* and all the fun we had we ain't talkin

I'm not perfect I suffer my addictions
But I would never **** some to perdition
Cause of prejudice to a skin condition
If loyalty to pigs is your position

We are through we ain't crew you ******* tool
I know I'm a bad person but you're worse than
An ex dealer while I grew you stayed a fool
It stings losin a friend but you ain't a man

See myself over the shoulder
Never associate with my self
**** hits the fan and I get colder
Losing touch with myself
Feels like I'm watching another life

These hands can't be mine
Hands shackled by crime
Over the shoulder
I watch a colder
Man than I, a killer

Treat myself to a cocktail and drugs
Treatment to stop failure of lungs
Self medicate and consolidate my ego
Before I lose my will and let it go
The last shreds of who I was sposed to be
Before I was exposed to the street

Look at an old photo and I don't know
The ***** in the picture where'd he go
Soft boy with kind eyes found on a milk carton
Killer was caught found in his skin got a pardon
Accomplices with Alice, Jane, and molly
I'm still me? are you ******* kidding me

I can't be someone I hardly know
Every action and word is for show
Reactions I can't predict what he'll do
Snap and he might follow through
Or I could rein it in and stay cool
Is he I, could be I wish it wasn't true

Can't hear a word you say
As i drown in rosé