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I wish to retreat,
perhaps to a cabin in the woods,
or, like Iris Murdoch’s hero,
to settle near the sea…

It has been so long
since I have felt true solitude.
I long for that silence
that only it can bring
to sit in stillness
and listen to my own thoughts,
to cook only for myself
and savor each single bite,
untouched by the street’s noise
that might disturb
my quiet comfort.
i'm not her
i'm not good
i'm not perfect
i'm not his
i'm not a good person
i'm not happy
i'm not stable
i'm not anything
I emerge when you're not there,
I hid from the worse of the abuse,
skinny into the sheets near pockets,
I hid my breath and the trembling
My mother knew I was always there,
but gave me points for the evasion.....
My own blood and their siblings,
but I hid like a strange and magically
once here and freezing like a
fridge.
I can't stand heat but the cooling
and rain affects fragility of wool...
I'm your Boo.
I'm your lover.
I'm your main thing.
The one you enjoy walking in the rain with.
Sharing all pain too.

I'm your Boo.
A person loyal and true.
Here to protect you.
For you there nothing I won't do.
Well, I'm not serving prison time for you

But will wine and dine you.
Go out of my way to impress you.
Because I am your Boo.

Forever faithful.
Forever true and honestly in love with you.
Israel is the little America.
America is the big Israel.
Both are disgusting outdated colonial projects.
Too disgusting to exist for too long.
Gnawing away Palestine and the world.
Like a malignant rotten cancer.

But time will not be long.
Slowly but surely both will collapse.
When Israel collapses Palestine will recover.
When America collapses the world will recover.
Of course it will not happen by itself.
We must tear it down together.
We must believe in our own power.
It's time for people power to take over.
In the end we will celebrate our greatest victory.
When Israel and America have become historical wrecks.


August 2025

By Alvian Eleven
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