Some nights
those old scars
hurt as much
as the day
they happened.
Itch as much
as if freshly healed.
Some nights they
are raw and they sting
even though they
are old and closed.
Some nights you feel
them burning and hurting
deep inside your mind
old wounds,
mental and physical
they itch and sting
long after they have
"healed"
sealed.

Hold me for a while
Love me for a while
I know there's no future
and yet I want you for a while.

Use me like a security blanket,
hold me close at night
when no one is around,
I don't mind.

Hold me for a while
until you can stand
firmly on your own.
Love me for a while
until I am no longer
of use to you.
I don't mind.

I'll comfort you,
be near you,
wrap you in warmth
Protect you from the dark
even if only for a while.

I'm here if you need me
here if you want me,
here until you cast me aside,
to move on to bigger and better things.

It seems I am in love
with ideas, notions,
and places I have never been.

I am in love with the idea
of forever,
of waking up beside
the one I love
everyday, until we both
cease to be.

I am in love with the notion
that there is someone
perfect for everyone,
that someday I wont
be all alone.

I am in love with the idea
of complete happiness
of being satisfied with
exactly what life hands me.

I am in love with places
that I have never been
places that I may never
get to go.
I am in love with
skylines I may never see.

I am in love with the idea
of love itself.
The notion that one can
accept someone
exactly as they are
and run away with their heart
to places neither
have ever been.

I am a manor
with two masters
I am a house divided
a soul in duress.

Half of me
sweet, happy, carefree.
Half of me
wants to dress up
to find  love,
to be neat.
Half of me
wants peace,
wants happiness.

The remainder,
is an *******.
cold, hardened, bitter.
The remainder
has lost hope
lost love.
The remainder
is tough and strong
never needing anyone.
The remainder
wants anarchy
thrives in chaos.

I am a house divided,
a manor with two master,
a soul in duress.

Youre nothing sick and sad
Eyes dark as old blood
Skin pale and cracked
Breath of vomite and bile
a voice that makes ears bleed
Skin and bones is all you are
Disgusting and vile
Others may not see it
I know its true
Remember when I loved you

Are you happy
really happy?
is your soul at rest
or are you just pretending,
to hurt me
the way I hurt you.

I never said
how much you meant to me
I never said
how many times I cried
I never said
it hurt being replaced
I never said
you were my escape
I never said
how much I hurt myself
by leaving
I never said
how I still feel
I never said
you replaced me
I never said
I miss you
I never said
and I never will.