all around, no sound, but I feel. I can feel cold, I can feel warm, I just go on whispering. Through the day I can change patterns, without any hesitation at all , I just goes on whispering, yet I has no mouth to whisper from. what am I?

What came first?
A barren land or a barren mind?
Perhaps the two are intertwined!
Is the glass half empty or half full?
Perspective is a state by design.
While some of the confined become free.
Those of who are free can be confined.
Sometimes the cuffs come on even before the jail time.
Those who are blind may not be able to see,
But those who see can be also be blind to things.
Blind to hatred, tears, and blood.
Blind to anger, click bait, and floods.
So I ask.
What comes first?
Others or ourselves?
In a land with book stores, we are its shelves.
Holding onto things that eventually collect dust.
Scenarios once opened but now shut.
Yet many hang on still.
Unable to rebuild.
Perhaps they never gained the proper skills?
Raised by those who were ill.
Ill suited to fill their empty cups.
Ill suited to lift them up.
So again I ask?
What came first?
The barren land or the barren mind?
I hope you come to realize, that they can be intertwined.

Could paint a picture with words,
Writing verses yawl never heard.
Take some time to observe.
Cause you’ll never know what you’ll learn.
Whether yawl stay grounded like an ant,
Or soaring through the air like a bird.
Taking steps forward is like watering a plant.
In order to grow,
It’s not about where you’ve been,
But where you’re at.
And I ain’t gonna lie,
Sometimes you might hit a set back,
But as they say life ain’t always gift wrapped.
Got to know when to take a break, and have a Kit Kat.
For stress, anxiety and depression, will only leave you trapped.
In a cycle of been there, done that.
Which can become a toxic habitat.
And trust me when I say,
It’s really hard to overcome that.
Especially when ones mind has been highjacked.
By the words of others,
That can pin you down to the mat.
For the one, two, three.
Where is that referee?
That be trying to **** on me?
Like I’m Ted Dibiase!
But seriously,
How do we,
Start cleaning up the debris,
That is taking up free,
Space within our minds, thoughts and dreams?
Well the answer will differ for both you and me.
Depending on what healing means.

Tranquil melodies swing back and forth,
Peaceful fairies spring like flowers bloom.
Faithful gnomes protect ones house.
From vengeful spirits with razor filled mouths.

Wonderful bliss, if only I wasn’t locked up like this.
Oh, how I miss those sweet kisses from Ms.Sun.
Those gentle breezes that rock me to sleep.
Or the green pastures that blankets my falls.

Depression is an emptiness that could never be filled.
Regardless of the cash, drugs, hoes, or food one tries to fill it with.
Depression is like drowning in the ocean.
With no one around to pull you up.
Depression makes normal tasks a chore.
Like smiling or getting out of bed for instance.
Depression is a broken heart that has been filled with betrayal, abandonment, and hate instead of love.
And just like Humpty Dumpty who knows when it’ll get put together again.
Depression can bring impulses to jump in front of cars or jump off bridges.
Depression is sadness that cannot always be expressed by tears.
Depression if not treated can lead to bad coping mechanisms to deal with it.
Depression doesn’t discriminate.
Depression is a wilderness.
Not sure which way to go.
With everything becoming treacherous.
Depression is like being on a tight rope.
Sometimes it can be hard to focus on the task at hand.
For fear can start to consume one’s soul.
Wondering if we fall,
Can we muster the strength to get back up?
Or plummet to their doom?

Sliding, huff and puff, just minding;
My own, getting high ain’t nothing;
Till it’s something, like momma when she see me mumbling off.
Under the tongue, thinking I’m sly enough.
Till I meets them ***** cuffs, that smack down, **** gets rough.
But I ain’t no hufflepuff, i’m a man, and my experiences helped me understand.
How to work them cards in my hand.
Gotta to fake it to you make kid,
In other words this **** is a scam.
Gotta avoid the beats that turns into the heat of the man.
Yeah that, Red and blue that’ll turn you black and blue;
Cause they don’t hold back unlike your old mam.
And prison ain’t no better, get tagged, then leave with a gun and lives in your hand.
But by then will ya even give a ****?
Uh!
Like the window to my soul, step back and watch me juxtapose.
Got break through this pane, the shackles left, raw and exposed.
Cause I Couldn’t cut it any closer if I chose.
Just Reaping what I sowed, as the reapers coming close.
I will never show, I will never slow, when I come face to face with my foes!
Cause Being Steadfast is all I know!

Steady hustlings all I know.
It’s all I know, it’s all I know.
Making something outta nothing;
Man that’s how I roll, that’s how I roll.
Real recognize real that’s how it goes!

Ride or die, steady hustlings all I know.
It’s all I know, it’s all know.
Making something outta nothing;
Man that’s how I roll, that’s how I roll.
Real recognize real that’s how it goes!

Be careful of what seems innocent.
Small acts of hate unseen by the eye,
Acts that can snowball into larger threats.
When tears could fill rivers high.
For their stories are suppressed.
As they defy,
The socially constructed narrative.
Can’t even say goodbye.
As that, like everything is prohibited.

Only a small demographic,
Can experience democracy.
After all it’s a demo,
That you got to pay to win!
Oh, the hypocrisy.

What makes a difference?
Apparently it’s pigment.
And worth is not equivalence.
When people are forced into shipments.
Is that what they mean by deliverance?
Wish this was all a figment.
For I in sane consciousness.
Cannot believe it.
That we live in a world,
That murders the innocent.
And justifies it as omnipotence.
And anyone who says otherwise,
Is a heretic.

Only a small demographic,
Can experience democracy.
After all it’s a demo,
That you got to pay to win!
Oh, the hypocrisy.

What is freedom?
Well it’s certainly ain’t free.
So, does that make it dumb?
To get wood, you must cut down the tree.
And to make a new land and a hefty sum.
You must cut down the native and Métis.
Seems fair to me. (Sarcasm)
So, than what is equality?
When the quality of one is tarnished,
For the sake of supremacy?
If we are equal?
Why are there still those in need?
If we have freedom,
Than why do we still bleed?
And the innocents in jail aren’t free?
Why are there still cries from those like George Floyd,
Screaming that they just can’t breathe?
Tell me!
If we have democracy,
Why are they still sterilizing people who look like me?
Why is there still so much divide and animosity?
And I like some many others,
Have to face discrimination on the basis of our biology?
Tell me! I really want to know!

Why is it?…

Only a small demographic,
Can experience democracy?
Maybe it is,
A demo after all.
That you got to pay to win!
Oh, the hypocrisy.

Swain hearted, of lovers departed. Thwarted by indecent individuals that mean to marry them off to people they do not know. Forswear it I, if they don't try to get away and find each other once more. Flighty, and young, they are strong willed, petty be it for thou to separate true love. Wanting it to be no more than a lingering afterthought. How can one besmirch destiny? How can one take out another persons heart and crush it in front of them. Barbaric savagery, doth the story go of reality impeding onto something good. No breaks, no time to be, but be in monotony. Love is a anomaly, stirring us in a loop of endless depravity. Hope is but a milky way dream, nothing but delusional grandeur of a adolescent mind. Fighting for something, loving for someone, worlds apart, but yet intertwined in each others heart. Responsibility is overrated, dignity is a barren commodity, courage is frowned upon. Rebellion is not tolerated, revolution is scandalous. What one won't do for love. What one won't sacrifice. What one is willing to die for. That is something most people never get, nor find, but for the few who do find it; know why it is worth giving it everything they got.

My name is Tony and this is my testimony. I am a ghost and you my host before I begin my story would you like some toast? Lost soul from elm street, caught by a dream demon who had all the control man who knew that I was not even safe with all the lights on and residing myself under my bed sheets. What's under my bed? Maybe it's all in my head? After all I am just a very imaginative kid, but now I'm just a servant or what others may call me by which is a druid. Don't worry Tony it's just a nightmare, yeah a living nightmare where i'm being hunted no matter where I go and all I got with me is my teddy bear. What's in the closet and where is that holy water I stole from a prophet? Running as fast as I can, he's coming and he's so close to me that I can't even think of a plan. Can't close my eyes so how can I pray to lord for my soul to keep, oh God please grant my cry to fly so I don't feel as helpless as a sheep. What's under my bed? Trying to avoid all the places with bloodshed. What's under my bed? Knowing something bad is going to happen when I see the colour red. What's under my bed? Seeing shadows of past, present, and future victims ahead.

Big world tiny people left to find out why were here
Psychos', revolutionary's, reactionary's, anarchy
Fighting each other, this is one mad world
Money is power and power is control but it doesn't last long
There is always a fall, pride is destroyed
What is truth, does it even exist?
Have many theories and ideologies but what should we believe
What does it mean to believe? What is a feeling? How do we know what it is? Have many questions but no answers or so we know if we know anything at all. Is it all some conspiracy or is life just something that can't truly be processed because we only use 10% of it.

why dads?
Men, or should we even call them that. So many of them diseased, they cheat, steal, ******, ****, and betray anything that breaths. Their are good one's out their but they usually die young, or they are married, etc. Fathers are the one's that usually abandon their kids once they leave their soon to be ex-wife for some other women. Men are suppost to be the authority figures but they abuse that power. They start wars that are pointless, they thrive on greed that will get them no where when they are close to death. Why is the world so cruel, well you don't have to look to far to know the answer. When I grow up I will not become this disease, I will not keep the pattern going any longer, cause it's time for someone to be a man, might as well be me.

Why God?
Pray and believe and please don't stray or leave. Stand tall and I know that life isn't grand but it'll be worse if you fall. Build up the church, rebuild your soul and don't focus on the worldly merch. Stay pure and remember when you have Jesus your path will be clear and there will be no fear. Ha-ha what *******, I am sick of all this, I tried religion and it left me in a deeper pit. Does God exist? Yes but does God know I exist? Hmm… Let me meditate on that; ok still not getting anything; where is God when the devil be busting my head over and over with a bat?

On my knees but I’m still getting fees that be stinging my bank account like some devilish bees. Where are you? Do you care, why do you seem so far, I'm at my breaking point and I don't know what to do! Reading the bible, starting to wonder if I’m just reading a bunch of fables. ****** job, ****** relations with both sides of my family, and ****** finances man do you think this hit is funny? Robbed from a normal childhood, bullied everyday, so I coped with it by eating lots of food. My mother taught me about you, made me believe that you were faithful and true. But maybe your no better than Santa or the Easter Bunny, as unhinged as ***** Wonka and oh how I wonder how you can sit up there while the world gets more crummy.

I got an Ill mind like Hopsin, man whatever happened to that jolly green giant, that guy died an reincarnated into a goblin. Stop that talk man because the devil is playing with your head, and stop that morbid talk of wanting to be dead! I used to listen to the 116 clique, because I couldn't stand regular worship or hymns because I found them boring, broad, and basic. I remember listening to guys like Fresh I.E then one day it changed to guys like N.W.A, Wu Tang Clan, and Puff Daddy. Everyday I used to read my bible and I would drag my momma to the holy temple, but now when I'm at church I get taste in my mouth like I took some Fentanyl. Religion is filled with hypocrites and I used to be sold out for God until I got treated like ****. I used to be a unashamed believer and I told everyone about you, but now my once pure heart has been stained and people who claim they know you, really don't know **** about you! I never shoved my belief down no ones throats, and the ones that do will be placed with the other goats.

Believe what you want just don't be a ****! That's all I ask, and it really shouldn't be that hard of a task. Putting all my issues on the table, if only I could go back in time like Cable. Momma told me to not test the Lord, but I'm tired of being choked by the societal cord. Torn between the religious and the secular, and when I die will I gain forgiveness or will I face the demonic tormentor? I don't know I’m just lost and angry and all I need is a boost or push to attain fame and money. I don't sell out, I sell in, all I got told was to get out, so sorry but I have no choice but to dwell in sin!

Harsh brash winters storm through a forgotten town, wind and snow being the only thing you hear in the atmosphere. drew mist brings blinding fogs to the eyes of any unexacting wanderers. Summer has come and gone, gone is freedom from most responsibilities, gone are the ghost stories that keep me up at night. Winter is here!

Sweet whispers, smooth soft kisses.
Sweet songs of reminiscing.
Watching as your eyes glisten.
Glisten like the stars.
Whose beauty is that of a winters rose.
Just wanting to hold you close.
In my arms, toasting by the fire.
With a night filled with passionate desires.
Waking up the next day, still next to you.
If this isn’t love baby, than I haven’t a clue.
For my mind is unglued just thinking about you.
Listening as birds be chirping harmonies.
As rose petals flutter softly all around you and me.
I never been this open or honest before until you confessed your love to me.
Especially when the thought of love once terrified me.
But with you in my arms my fears just melt away.
Two beings moulded like clay.
Two souls united as one.
Until death takes one of us away.
But until then let us make some memories and have some fun.

Light peaks through the darkness,
Shadows steadily retreat,
Peace returns.
A calm drifts softly down,
Like rose petals.
From a tree wiser than all my years combined.

Such sweet nectar,
Wealthier than all the gold in Asgard.
Such beautiful blossoms.
One of the many forms of wisdom.
Grown from light and darkness.
What fruit will I harness?
What blossoms shall I possess?

I remember when people said love is like a connection,
Back in December I met a girl that gave me affection.
Back then I fell hard, blinded from detection.
Thought this girls heart needed protection.
Who knew it was my heart that needed protection from her deception.
Had open wounds and she was the infection.
Left me for dead,
As regret shoots out bullets into my head.
But I made my bed,
So as I’m fed..
To the lions,
I wonder if shall enter Zion.
But because I can’t let bygones be bygones,
With an anger that burns hotter than the sun.
I’ll probably end up down under,
So, as I enter with Mr. Grim Reaper,
To a place where the devil plunders,
Souls of unbelievers.
I wonder,
Will I one day meet that witch down here?

My eyes are dotted,
My lips are sown.
The needle digs deep,
My blood runs cold.
Trickling down.
(Drip, drip)
Time moves on,
(Tick, tick)
The room is spinning.
I’m about to slip.

(Into madness, into madness)

My soul has been Eviscerated.
I don’t have my joystick,
I’ve lost control.
I used to dance to my own beat,
Should have held on.
But what can you expect from a doll?
Could be torn to shreds,
And try to patch me back up,
But I’ll never be whole.
After all…
If one’s innocence dies,
Can they truly grow old?

My eyes are dotted,
My lips are sown.
The needle digs deep,
My blood runs cold.
Trickling down.
(Drip, drip)
Time moves on,
(Tick, tick)
The room is spinning.
I’m about to slip.

(Into madness, into madness)

The burdens bare,
Naked without a care.
Empty & incomplete.
Because life ain’t fair.
A blank stare that engulfs,
And consumes like a black hole.
That dead expression,
That traps all within its grasp, like a sink hole.

My eyes are dotted,
My lips are sown.
The needle digs deep,
My blood runs cold.
Trickling down.
(Drip, drip)
Time moves on,
(Tick, tick)
The room is spinning.
I’m about to slip.

(Into madness, into madness)

where the wind blows I shall go,
neither here nor there or any where,
I am neither low to the ground or high like the sky,
I just drift along with the wind floating ever so peacefully,
I never stay but I may come back again SOME DAY,
I go with the wind not against it,
I am what I am,
Neither here nor there or anywhere!

Classy came, classy continually and confidently game. Future fame, fan fever is frantically and fanatically insane. Mr. Maniacal making machine like maneuvers, knocking down all these rappers who are no more than bootleggers. One to monitor, rap game I have just commandeered, don’t give two ***** if I become popular. Baa, Baa, Boom, better make room, no time to go to the restroom, it’s time for hope to bloom. I will literally die if I can’t help change this demented land, not here to command or demand; I’m here to expand and give struggling people a hand. Power will throw a fit if you try to abuse it, not a time to split, for giving up is the worst crime to commit. Time to make the fire run wild, time to leave all things holding you back to be exiled.  I know it’s not exactly a walk in the park, I know that making a change in your life can be as hard as hitting a target in the dark. There are seasons that are bright, there are seasons that are dim, there are people who bring light, and there are people who are just grim. Is there such a thing as good hate or bad love? Could there be such a things as determined fate or sad dove’s?

Are humans just wise fools? Are we truly kind, when we choose to rather be cruel? Life is bittersweet, not happy even if you’re in the master suite, not happy because we all secretly feel we are not complete. Painfully beautiful, awfully lucky, bountifully barren, oh how much I love living in sweet agony.  I tried to whistle in the dark, but people are a wreck they need some real fine tuning, they need more than just one little spark. As all eyes start to loom, as I slowly tame all the shrews, as I continently battle with all these thoughts filled with gloom. You need to have some real big long teeth to get through some ****, its takes more than wit, if you don’t commit; you will lose all of it. Saucy punctilious wenches, so dicey, so spicy, just inches from reaching all your potential senses. Reaching the very edges of what is possible, living in a time that has done what was once thought implausible.

Sometimes I wish I was a Solomon with some of my decisions, sometimes I just forget to put my foot in my mouth, which usually leads to head on collisions. I have an ambition, before rap I never had a position in society, but now with this transition I got some notoriety.  Never wanted to be in the spotlight, I just wanted to write, I just wanted real freedom and equal rights.  Here come the dots, what, you kidding, you aren’t seriously thinking that some humans are actually modified robots? Hustling so hard, you can call me Rick Ross, rhymes so fresh from yours truly: The Classy boss. Getting between the cracks like dental floss, cutting through all this corruption as if it were moss. Strong and steady, this is not a gong show, so please don’t bring out the confetti. If you want to be healthy you best eat your veggies, if you don’t want wedgies learn how to fight because life isn’t nice and sweet like cherries or strawberries. Time to be edgy, so it’s time to get rid of all of your teddies. Jaded by all of the junk, jealous insecure jocks aren’t worth your time, so don’t be afraid to let loose your groovy funk.

Face is ill and filled with hate trying to facilitate vassals as bait. Perps pet fate by perpetuating crime rate, and they so unprepared and shocked when they get their court date. But being a pro takes a toll but that’s just apart of my daily protocol. Give Ben a drill and if he get a headache get him some Benadryl. Is any of this real, cause it is a real pain in my *** for I feel more persecuted than Israel. We all spin this distorted wheel, and we all give in to distorted ideals.  This just gets so crazy like schizophrenia, hasn’t it come clear to ya that reality is an unusual phenomena. Edge your hate by being educated, getting hella drunk on alcohol and wondering how it all magically evaporated. Frozen status, frozen madness going in like mad max aborting you like you a fetus. What the funk got my tongue out like I’m about to do the Jordan dunk. What the hell is up with you, I would tell you but I’m too busy man as I got a lot to do. Socialist views you probably look at me with a negative lens on the news but whether or not you listen is really up to you.  Simple lies symbolize several slides of slimy sneaky snarky callous human intentions throughout their lives. Cyclical intervals got us going in circles, clinical irrational rotting thoughts parade our brains that make us unethical. Suffering succotash all these issues make me wanna get some hash..browns hold up sit down be humble before one gains the crown. Blundering balderdash swerving in hoping not to crash, and it sounds easier then it is so don’t bash me cause I’m like a one man stampede just like vash. Everything is a metaphor do you get that ***** for its just all a election for another **** in office to ***** us over and give us *** sores. Family structures becoming like the dinosaur, for we have no time for them as we to busy fighting in the money war. So expensive, unrepentant, unreflective, so offensive and uninventive. Such is our demented state of mind but it’s to late to take a rewind and remind ourselves of the morals and values left behind.

Far from you, wondering how you are. Haven't seen you for awhile now
seems like an eternity, but I know our love will overcome all obstacles. A world apart, living life alone from one another. Days go by, we write each other, when I read what you have written, it's as if your right beside me. I can't wait till we see each other again, because I love you, you are my whole world.

Would you believe?
What I’ve seen, what I’ve seen!
What do you need?
To believe, to believe?

From living on welfare to living fairly well.
Grew up in church like kapowski,
Guess we were both saved by the bell.
I can guarantee there’s a God compadre,
cause I’ve been through hell.
But I refuse to drag my *** on the pavement,
Even if that **** does sell.
Cause imma true rebel,
And only time will tell.
If I succeed of fail.
So, You see, pray tell, I hope you listen closely, listen well.
Gotta keep one’s intents not stuck on your pretence.
I relent that fact that **** can get intense in an instance.
Enough to make one dive in a pool filled with incense.
Offend the masses with insensitivity,
Yet Treating it like a **** trapped within tents.
No place to run when incensed, at least until one pays them in cents.
Cause that makes sense, doesn’t it?
At least to the insensible next generations,
That needs to be carried like a decimal.
But is that truly justice at all?
Uh..

Would you believe?
What I’ve seen, what I’ve seen!
What do you need?
To believe, to believe?

They tell me to be quiet, bruh I don’t buy it.
They call me a savage, yet I’m not the one who’s violent.
So, I’m not about to dial it down for you clowns that grow silent.
When I reveal the truth once denied and paid off with benevolent funds.
Which loaded the bullets for tiny Tim’s gun.
Cause we’re only good when we’re gone!
I am second to none, go ahead buy my merch.
Than Get told off for wearing a cap in the church, must be capping, cause they ain’t humble enough to get off their perch.
God don’t care about appearances, he cares for the hurt, so before you judge us at least do your research!
Uh…
I ain’t a republican, a democrat, or a conspiracy theorist.
I simply don’t trust politicians, aristocrats, or  cbc journalists.
I trust in the alpha and omega, the OG purist.
That’s why I support Israel and not barbaric Hamas terrorists!
Yes sir!

Would you believe?
What I’ve seen, what I’ve seen!
What do you need?
To believe, to believe?

Turn the dial,
Stroke the flames.
Life’s a river,
I’m in denial,
Got no one else to blame.
Such a shame.
Yeah, such such a shame.

Left to sit in a pile…
Of my own waste,
It’s been awhile,
Since the mirror’s been turned,
And I’m left face to face.
With the weight and the guilt,
Once displaced.

Maybe I’m the bad guy, maybe I’m the stooge.
Maybe the reason for my hurt wasn’t you!
Maybe I’m the villain, maybe I’m the poison.
Maybe I’m the one who actually hurt you!
What do I do?
What can I do?
When…
I’m an wounded animal,
That only knows how to hurt.

Turn up the radio,
I don’t want to hear it.
Let me continue to dismiss the feelings.
And manipulate the scenario.
So, I stay in control and you submit.
But yeah I’m the victim.
You just don’t understand.
I’m the victim, I’m the ******.

Just let me wallow,
In my delusions.
Because I refuse to swallow.
The bitter truth.
That I just might be the pollution.
With a hate that has broken me beyond repair.
Yeah, it’s a despair that sours taste.

So, maybe I’m the bad guy, maybe I’m the stooge.
Maybe the reason for my hurt wasn’t you!
Maybe I’m the villain, maybe I’m the poison.
Maybe I’m the one who actually hurt you!
What do I do?
What can I do?
When…
I’m an wounded animal,
That only knows how to hurt.

From young beckons change.
From old beckons wisdom.
Understanding is what makes us unique and special.
We can learn from both instead of clashing.
Time to find a middle ground so that future generations don't suffer.

Eyes full of wonder and amusement,
Heart of gold and love,
Lips of mystery and romance,
Ears as good as an owl or elephant,
Deep consuming desire I have for thee,
You are the piece of my heart that I never knew I had,
When I'm with you mountains seem like hills,
And the rivers feel like oceans,
You are truer than a loyal knight to a king,
You're more smart than any other human being in the universe,
You are perfect in every sense of the word,
When I see you my heart beats faster than the speed of sound.