The governments promises,
Are nothing more than lip service,
Trying to fix corpses with bandages,
Yet although nothing changes,
Why do citizens still give em roses?
As if they are in hypnosis?
And If they are it may explain the psychosis.
For electing a drama teacher that’s lawless.
The idiotic nature of this,
Is simply flawless.
Really can Canadians be more thoughtless?
Voting in Castro Junior,
How scandalous.
Let me guess the SNC-Lavalin affair,
Was nothing more than an entanglement?
And the WE charity was just an accident,
Or doing black face was supposed to be a compliment.
Let me guess you must also think,
Canada being trillions of dollars in debt is an accomplishment.
Or that firing Jody Wilson-Raybould is just apart of progress?

Depression is an emptiness that could never be filled.
Regardless of the cash, drugs, hoes, or food one tries to fill it with.
Depression is like drowning in the ocean.
With no one around to pull you up.
Depression makes normal tasks a chore.
Like smiling or getting out of bed for instance.
Depression is a broken heart that has been filled with betrayal, abandonment, and hate instead of love.
And just like Humpty Dumpty who knows when it’ll get put together again.
Depression can bring impulses to jump in front of cars or jump off bridges.
Depression is sadness that cannot always be expressed by tears.
Depression if not treated can lead to bad coping mechanisms to deal with it.
Depression doesn’t discriminate.
Depression is a wilderness.
Not sure which way to go.
With everything becoming treacherous.
Depression is like being on a tight rope.
Sometimes it can be hard to focus on the task at hand.
For fear can start to consume one’s soul.
Wondering if we fall,
Can we muster the strength to get back up?
Or plummet to their doom?

If I was white,
Would they believe me?
If I was white,
Would they finally see me?

When I was abused,
Would I have gotten help?
Instead of being refused,
They would’ve checked for the welts.
When I’d go shopping,
I wouldn’t worry about security flocking,
Checking on me, thinking I’m stealing.
Wondering when they’ll be kneeling,
On my throat, unable to keep breathing.
Becoming the next George Floyd.
But being native, it probably won’t be in the tabloids.
Oh ****, Canada may become annoyed.
Get over it, no longer will we be trapped in your void.
Our voices will be heard,
No longer will we be ignored.
So, if I got to stir some pots,
They’ll be stirred.
You may think it’s chaos,
But like they say, you live and die by the sword.

But...
If I was white,
Would they believe me?
If I was white,
Would they finally see me?

If I went missing,
Would they actually try to find me?
If I became homeless,
Would they actually lend me money?
Well they probably would if I were white,
Or if I was actually seen as a human with basic civil rights.
But sadly I’m native,
Someone that is seen as an inconvenient plight.
After 500 years you’d think, we wouldn’t continue being treated like parasites?
But if I was a foster child,
Would I be adopted?
If I was being threatened,
Would I be Protected?
Well they probably would if I were white,
Or if I was actually seen as a human with basic civil rights.
But sadly I’m native,
Someone that is seen as an inconvenient plight.
After 500 years you’d think, we wouldn’t continue being treated like parasites?

But...
If I was white,
Would they believe me?
If I was white,
Would they finally see me?

I’ve become addicted to an image,
I could never full grasp,
Heart is hollow,
With my mind spinning,
Running laps.
Wondering how long,
It’ll take for me to collapse.
Don’t tell me to relax,
I thought I was through all this ****,
But it comes back to haunt me,
On medication,
To dull out the empty.
The emptiness that lives inside.
That almost lead me down a path of suicide.
A shame embedded deep inside.
An anxiety that tried to hide.
Within a fake smile.
Telling you that I’m okay.
When I wasn’t.
I’m sorry for that.
My brain has become a tangled web.
And I’m not sure if I can untangle it.
It’s like the Two sides of my soul have been caught up in an entanglement.
****.

Addicted to a fantasy.
That used to look innocent.
Temptation was the ecstasy,
That left me in imprisonment.

Yeah I was addicted to a fantasy.
That used to look innocent.
Wonder I could snap back to reality.
And beat this ****?

It’s like every-time I try to escape,
I end up having a relapse,
Who knew that lust packs a punch?
That has turned my brain to mush,
That is always looking for a rush,
Can this stain on my heart,
Ever be washed?
I ask myself,
As I sit and wonder,
For one can hibernate all they want,
But that doesn’t take away the hunger.
Wish I wasn’t so foolish when I was younger.
For when I look in the mirror now,
All I see is a monster.
Was taught respect women,
Yet here I am an imposter.
That if he’s honest,
Doesn’t even honour himself.
Is told he is amazing and funny.
Yet he can’t see his own wealth.
If only people could see his struggles with mental health.
And the trauma that has been dealt.
Which doesn’t excuse the behaviour,
Of a sinner who is...

Addicted to a fantasy.
That used to look innocent.
Temptation was the ecstasy,
That left me in imprisonment.

Yeah I was addicted to a fantasy.
That used to look innocent.
Wonder I could snap back to reality.
And beat this ****?

Hook:
If I don’t take care of myself,
Imma burn out,
If I can’t distress,
Imma have to get the blunt out.
(X2)

Verse 1:
My minds playing tricks,
Got me in a bind; need a fix.
For my hearts in a twist,
Swirling all directions,
Like a tornado I seem to drift,
In and out a state of bliss.
Shut my eyes,
And lock lips,
With the temptress.
An allure I can’t resist.
Even if I want to quit.
Yeah got my mind playing tricks,
Got me in a bind; need a fix.

Hook:
If I don’t take care of myself,
Imma burn out,
If I can’t distress,
Imma have to get the blunt out.
(X2)

Got my mind playing tricks,
Got in a bind; need a fix.
Like an imposter, I need to vent.
Why can’t I just forget?
The debt which persists.
On my heart, that’s is caged like a convict.
Why can’t I escape this nonsense?
Is it because of the guilt of my conscience?
That desperately wants to be honest.
But instead I down a ***** tonic.
Why can’t I be strong enough to fight this?
I just want to keep my promise.
To demolish all this foulness.
For...

Hook:
If I don’t take care of myself,
Imma burn out,
If I can’t distress,
Imma have to get the blunt out.
(X2)

They strip us from our homes,
Tear up all our clothes.
Cutting up our hair, which was our strength.
Washing away our disease, for heaven’s sake.
Beat us for speaking our language.
And if we revolt they lock us away in cages.
Is there hope for a better life?
When we are still looked at as savages?
Watching as sisters end up missing.
Watching as brothers end up on the streets tweaking.
Is there hope for a better life?
When we are still looked at as the problem?
Watching fathers sip the fire water, get angry and start the beating.
Watching mothers grow submissive to the patriarchy prison.
Is there hope for a better life?
With the barriers that still exist within our society’s system?

A sickly reaction,
That causes some caution.
Where brains have snapped like twigs.
A death as sweet as a fig.

In the hollow night,
Where the true terrors hide in plain sight.
A gripping despair,
With the inner monster appearing in the mirror.

A devilish figure,
With fingers sharper,
Than the sickle of the grim reaper.

As it draws closer.
Flowers wither.
As it draws closer.
Ready to devour my fear.
That to him is a gravy type flavour.

As I stare into its bottomless abyss for eyes.
I hear other souls that have been consumed cry.
As I stare into those dismal eyes.
I know I can’t escape.
For it’s presence leaves me paralyzed.

With a breath that blankets me,
In a cold embrace.
As its shadow slowly consumes me.
My last thought lingers inside my happy place.