I need to feel alive, because I am not, I'm barly breathing, my heart has been shot.

I take a deep breath and I close my eyes, I fake one more smile and say my good byes.

I walk away and close the door, don't come looking for me, I can't take anymore.

I'm dead
But not literally

I'm scarred
As in Physically

I'm lost
Only mentally

I'm living
... Technically

I will never be mourned over
never be missed

I will never be cried over
So I slice my wrist

I'm mad at you
But I miss you

I don't wanna talk to you
But I need you

I wanna push you away
But I want you to hold me

I wish I could forget you
But at the same time I want you in my  life forever

I love you
But I don't want to

haven't been writing
been too busy working
finally I have found my place,
my grind, my groove
I've made friends
I've made money
but most importantly
I've made myself proud

Forgive me for I have loved so many
I forgot the most important
Which was myself.

We're on a
Merry-Go-Round
that never stops
going round

We're on a
Roller Coaster
that never stops
it's ups and downs

We're on a
Ferris Wheel
that never stops
spinning

We're on a
ride full of problems
that never
gets solved