I
sabotage
the
wheels

before I get on the wagon.

Fire in one hand
liquid in the other
clutching these crutches
with feelings to smother
the pill
the powder
the *****
these people
my heart on my sleeve
soiled by the deceitful

What fun is life really,
with it all figured out?

I've done my time
Inside my mind
and in my heart
I've come to find
The way to unlock
These cell doors
Is with what's mine
not what's yours

I used to daydream
that one day
I would tell our children
the story of us
A tale full of trials
and tribulations
roadblocks, detours, fences, hurdles
heartache and longing
fate and destiny
a coupling that seemed impossible
which would rival
all the fairy tales throughout history
where love still
somehow conquered all
as you looked upon my telling
with that adorable
wrinkled look on your face
of disapproval
but sadly,
I realize
it is a story I'll never get to tell.

Maybe it was insane
it may all be in vain
but given a second go
I'd do it all again the same

Over the years
all that you said
the glimmer in your eyes
with the way you looked at me
The words exchanged
those perfect moments in your arms
regardless of how seldom
and far between
they may have been
neither of us could escape
the passion shared
in spite of the short distance
that seemed a million miles
or how fate
always seemed to bring us back
to each others presence
as if time and space deemed it
which we always returned to
as if it were yesterday
when we least expected
but its your silence
that almost convinces me
it never meant a thing.