Two builders at my door
Mending the brickwork,
The hardwood board
That’s kindness for sure.

Tenderly I watch them point
With lovingly made cement
A tradesman’s gifted skill
Thank you Charlie and Bill.

Love Mary ***

Is it the wave kissing the sand
          or is it the ocean
                   deep from her heart
sometimes gently,
                                  often hard,
but always with passion?

Is it the sand kissing back
        or is it the land
            happily losing ground
with every kiss
             to his eternal mistress,
the occupant of his soul?

What does it mean to be
Emotionally unavailable?
My manic thoughts keep me starving for
An imagined happy

“Are you single?” They asked
Well, my heart is as open as an old wound
That reopens & bleeds & scars for
Vicarious validation
Yet closed in the sense that it shuts down
Every time it starts to feel something
Almost habitually,
As if in self defense
I guess you could say my heart was a
Twisted & distanced kind of available...

But no
I’m not available in my mind
Because it knows better than my
Feeling *****
The human container that’s headstrong
To it’s gullible nature
My thinking ***** knows that
Vicarious happy is not real happy
Which labels my forehead like a neon sign
Emotionally Unavailable

I crave a validation that looks like your love
But it won’t fix me
Or provide the happiness I
Desperately need for myself

And in twenty-something years, after love and heartbreak, joy and sorrow. After so many lessons learned and good times had, and all of the ups and downs. With all of the people I've met, and through a stroke of luck, the people I've helped...

I have come to realize that I don't know anyone.


The darker corners of your mind, the condition it's in. Like hunger.

It's not something that goes away.


Empty.


All is lost.

"Waiting for a gallant knight in shining armor to arrive and sweep you off your feet?

Sorry, but those ******* don't exist.

Mine does."