I am tied to the train track
I cannot move
I hear the train approaching
I realise the train driver is you

Some people throw treasure in the trash
It's easy to do that when you don't know what you have
You were a treasure yet I threw you in the trash

Lately I've been wandering the streets

Catching glimpses of a place that I used to belong to

Lately I've been taking mental pictures

Storing them in files that no one else can access

Lately I've spent more time on my own

Discovering the true meaning of lonely

Now I'm standing in the middle of your street

Asking if you still know how to love me

You asked me for the truth
So I told you the truth
Babe, it aint my fault
That you don't like what I told you

You asked me for the truth
So I told you the truth
Babe, you should know that honesty
Is the only thing I can do

Love is a bitter thing when you don't have it
Truth is an ugly thing when all you know are pretty lies
Love is a bitter thing when it passes you by

Truth has a tendency to be mistaken
Love is both as invisible and valuable as oxygen
Peace just happens to be friends with both of them

Looming over me menacingly
Vividly vicious
The truth
In it's painful honesty
Plain to see
Evidently
The truth of a looming prophecy

Guess who I saw today?
Myself.
In you.

I wonder if today you saw
Yourself.
In me.

h
e
l
l
it's a place that i have come to know
it's a place that i hope to go
h
e
a
v
e
n

Her *******, voluptuous and heavy
His breathing, shallow and fast
Their bodies entangled in a mess of lost limbs
Two lovers keeping themselves warm through the winter

His arms, tattooed and tough
Her neck, ringed with bruises from a former abuser
A night of frenzied madness somehow construed as passion
An escape from a life of mundane expectations

Her voice, soft and melodious
His touch, gentle yet commanding
Their short term union causing long term confusion
Two lovers present in the magic of the moment

She remembers a man
Sordid and strong
Self righteous
Vicious
Contentious
Wickedly wrong

She remembers a man
Strong yet insecure
Vulnerably pure
Self deprecating
Thought provoking
Full of so much fear

She remembers two men
One angel
One demon
Caught in the insanity
Of two men that were the same

My soul is tired but you can't see it
Cause I mask that **** with a chesire cat grin
So you think I'm on fire
When I'm actually sinking

Your soul is wide awake and I can see it
I can see you shining from a mile away
It's in the way you dance to music that no one else can hear
It's in the way you seize the moment before it disappears
Or the way you embrace monumental change

My soul is tired but you're keeping it awake

Turn the light off for I cannot bare to watch this scene
I never knew that romance could end up so **** ugly

How can I change for you?
I won't even change for me
I don't change for anyone
I'm unchanging

Let me tell you a story
Of a poet who forget her words
To tell you that this was debilitating
Would
Be
An
Absolute

U
N
D
E
R
S
T
A
T
E
M
E
N
T

Today I decide to believe
I believe in my undying beauty
Today I choose to be self encouraging
This epic beauty is undying

I swallowed your deceit
I spat it straight out
Some things are too ugly to be digested

I looked at the regurgitation
Stunned at the magnificence
Of what lay before me

A scarlet rose flourished in the sun
Nothing like how it had begun

What had been deceit
Was now beautiful truth
My vessel of integrity
Turned your lies into purity

I left it there, on display
Solid proof that things can change

The universe is crazy and I am in love with her
She has the kind of beauty that comes in with the rain

I cannot comprehend death
I cannot comprehend ending
Maybe because we never really end at all

People are so crazy
We just don't make sense
We lie and cheat and steal and ******
Yet we still have this mysterious innocence

I don't even know if things like "good" and "bad" exist
I do know that most of us are trying our best

The universe is crazy and I am in in love with her
She has the kind of beauty that is truly insane

I know that you'll find someone eventually
I know that it will make this broken heart bleed
I know that you will love her forever
Instead of for just one night
I know you will not leave her unrequited

I know you'll find someone eventually
I'll pretend I'm happy for you
I'll never reveal the reality
I'll hug her, smile and pretend to be her friend
I'll hide my emotions so I don't lose you completely

I know that you'll find someone eventually
She'll be everything I'm not and more
She will give you her heart and you will give her yours
She'll be everything that you've been looking for

I know that you will someone eventually
I know that someone will never be me

Where are you going?
Where will you be?
I need to know the places to avoid
I need some distance to fill this void

I won the war
You asked if I was proud
I could never feel pride
For having to fight
In the first place
I won the war
I'm left with the thought
What were we even fighting for?

It was snowing in the frost of my heart
Your smile melted the icy shards
Warming me with your intrinsic laugh
Just like that,
I was brand new
Amazing what a smile can do

You are so weak
Weaker than ****
Fortunately I am strong enough for us both

what happens when we die?
i don't think i really want to know the answer

what happens when we fail to live?
i have always known that answer

He looks me up and down
The way only men know how
He says,

"Tell me again
My **** Possession
Why do we still need Feminism?"

I look him in the face
The classy way that I was raised
I say,

"The mere fact that you asked me this
Is the reason Feminism exists"

He turns and walks away
In the direction that he came

I am reminded yet again
Of our desperate need for change

She is dressed in black with eyes so sad
The funeral procession is marching

She has so many regrets but she cannot go back
The finality is startling

The coffin is laden with poetry and roses
Symbolising romantic connection

She will remember this after he decomposes
This morbidly touching expression

They didn't want to say goodbye
Death didn't give them a choice
She remembers on the day he died
His soft and gentle voice
Do not fret and do not cry
I've loved you and thats enough
It is time to say goodbye
Life was good for I had your love

She is dressed in blue in high heeled shoes
On her first date in three years

His eyes, a brown hue gives her a sense of de ja vu
The reason for this is not quite clear

She feels a trace of shame everytime she says his name
While her wedding ring still sits on her dresser

Yet she can hear her husband's words within a memory preserved
That he'll support her on her every endeavour

She didn't want to move on
He didn't give her a choice
She remembers on the day he died
His soft and gentle voice
Remember to continue smiling
Remember to love again
Long after I leave this life
We will still be friends

She is dressed in white on a warm day in July
The brown eyed man is telling her his vows

It is at this time that she comes to realise
Why his eyes are so familar somehow

They are the exact same shade that got her carried away
By a different man so many years ago

As the groom kisses the bride any remaining grief subsides
Pure joy replacing the dark sorrow

They didn't want to say goodbye
Death didn't give her a choice
She remembers on the day he died
His soft and gentle voice
One day all your grief will end
One day your broken heart will mend
It is time to say goodbye
Until we meet again

I don't want to win
I want to live
In a world where winning doesn't matter

What is this competition
That I did not sign up for?

I don't want to win
I want to live
In a world where winning doesn't matter

i live in a world where self acceptance is a social crime
where honesty is a joke
i live in a world of blank stares and self gratification
i can be a hundred different personalities and no one will bat an eyelid
no one will even notice
i live in a world where no where is safe
where asking for safety is a sin
i live in a world where no mistake can be erased or forgotten
for everyone has an online record
dictating if and when i can move on
i live in a world where suicide becomes a necessity
or a fun thing to do
or a distraction
i live in a world that is utterly *******

I never asked to be your victim
You made me into one
Without asking for my permission

I never asked to be the subject
Of this endless torment
Of this ceaseless disrespect

I never asked but here I am
******* in your rancid *******
Following your putrid commands

I never asked to be your victim
You forced me into one
I promise myself that I will find a way out