As I sit
On a deck chair
In the sun
Outside my childhood home
And let the sun
Leave its mark of beauty
On my skin,
My thoughts flow
Like poetry
And I am happy once again.

I can hear
The delicate chirp
Of birds
And wonder whether
They're saying:
"You should've done this
A long time ago."

Then you said something about
how this shouldn’t
couldn’t happen again

picking your shorts
off the floor
squirming your legs into them

like milky straws

me in bed
your reflection in the mirror
one hand in your hair

strands hurled
back and forth
as if throwing last night

out of your head

red streams in your eyes
stains on the table
and I’m static but inside

all over the place

I have never tried so hard to scrub
the skin off of my body
every inch he so unlovingly
touched
I have never wanted to wash away
a human being
who took my morals and my body
away from me
I have never expected
to be a statistic
I have never expected
for it to be me
I am strong right?
I'm strong and free.
Until Im locked in a room
On my knees.
He humiliated
and he changed
Me.

I've been dreaming lately.
Painting watercolor images on the canvas in my mind
Watching romantic movies on my eyelids
Singing in my sleep.
I dream that I confess everything to you
The way that I feel, what I truly think
And I even place my heart in your hands.
I wake up whispering "I love you".
Sometimes your forehead is resting on mine as I say it
Other times you're walking away...
The scenario continues to change,
But the result is always the same...
I continue to love you.

My insides turn to ice and a sheet of black slate cover my eyes the longer I go without you.
You melt off the hatred that consumes me and I become an angel within your arms.