No glass in the mirror,
No string in the blinds,
Bag searched for things to hurt me,
Observed to be kind.
Be kind to this broken wreck of a shell?
With meds and talking, could I become well?
Don’t give me hope,
It’s further to fall.
I’m not strong, not able
To ever stand tall.
Strangers - who all know unbearable pain,
All hoping to never feel this again.
Or maybe we’re all expecting to fail?
So they’ll all say ‘she tried - but to no avail’
Loved ones can then know,
They did all they could.
That we tried and we cried,
But were misunderstood.
I really don’t want to pass on this pain.
But I’m too tired, too useless,
To fight this again.
A daily journal of my 30-days as an inpatient at a mental health hospital