as much as you
stabbed me in the back
as much as i
slit both of my wrists
as much as you
squeezed my heart
as much as i
claimed to be alright
suppose you should know
you can't **** something
that has already died

reduced to nothing
unsure of everything
cornered by your words
imprisoned by my naivete

my chains appear to be made
of peonies and tulips
my walls appear to be more
like murals of better times

i lack the decisivness
to make the decision
i plead pitifully to find the might
to step into that decision easily

the floor keeps creaking
letting the sadness escape
and i love to keep seeking
for the boards to fix it

the windows got left open
letting the world crash through
and i love to keep hopin'
that the boards will hold

the roof is starting to fall
letting the pressure creep in
and i love to stare at it all
realizing the boards aren't enough

Baby please don't lie
To yourself or anybody
You could never rely
On me and I let you down
Just to leave you looking up
At the infinite and the stars
When the tears start cascading
And the love is evaporating
As your heart pumps and bleeds
You'll forget your wants
And probably your needs
You'd do best to forget me
Leave no room for bitterness
And I won't regret our memory
This story was a setting sun
I knew it wouldn't last and
I'm just sorry I wasn't the one

Been so **** miserable
For so **** long
Saying I don't need anyone
And I don't need help
For the record
I don't choose Misery
I am Her favorite company

all i ask for
is to not be
a horrific reminder
of all my flaws
is just a bit
of the closure
that i lack
is to just
be what i have
been dying for

please know that
i would die
if there was
a universe
that had a place
for me
so why am i
pretending i belong
in this reality
where i am not
even enough
for me