As thoughts fog my brain like thick clouds in the sky,
I remember the night when I was still alive.
I remember the story - I know how it goes;
You stab me, you **** me, you take off my clothes.

You draw in your sword - you think I'm not looking;
I'm lost, right where you want me; I gave you permission
I remember the sound; the intake of breath,
With that push I collapse, in the mud, in the dirt.

I recall the scene with perfect precision,
You drew out your sword without losing my vision;
The blood came rushing out as did my cry of pain,
As I died in your arms I left my ****** stain.

My eyes watered up whilst you made sure I'm dead
Thought you were the hero, you're the villain instead.
Dead in the eyes, heart of stone, as you moan,
You've taken my life, now the ashes are blown.

You're gone now, heart breaker, you villain of love;
You're done with my body, hidden, dug and shoved.
But you can't **** me twice now, I'm back, I'm immortal-
You're away but I'll haunt you - this poem's our portal.

You asked me what made me like you and I lied by telling you I wasn't sure. I remember exactly when I realized it. I remember what I was doing, I remember what you were doing. I remember the small details like the girl sitting between us had brown hair, and wouldn't talk despite our best efforts to make conversation. I remember how the conductor got impatient with us because I kept turning around to talk to you and our other friend. I remember the exact second I realized that I liked you. After 2 years of not letting myself feel, you made me start to feel, so for months leading up to it I made myself tell me that I didn't have feeling. But darling, I remember the moment I realized I had fallen to hard for you. The way your hair had fallen without your hat. I remember the weird smile you had made at me to make me laugh when I got mad at the other girl in my section. I remember the way other people had told me on the side they were jealous of the love we had because they thought we were already together. They said you looked at me like I was secretly special. Eventually I opened up, layed everything out infront of you and you told me it was mutual. But we only lasted a little over a month because you weren't happy. I knew it and when I asked you told me everything was fine and not to worry. I believed you too. That was my mistake. I should have stopped you and told you that I knew somwthing was wrong. As soon as I found out you weren't happy I left you. You asked for my advice about why I would end it so quickly so I sat you down and explained it to you. How every detail was a memory I had, and that if you aren't happy, you should never draw things out longer than they need to be. So here I am, drunk, lost, lonely, and thinking about how im shutting my emotions down again. But you're happy, and all I've wanted is for you to be happy.

I feel a blue summer
can't find my brain
lost it on a walk
to the moon
never back

I love earth
please take care of her

while I'm gone
I might not come back

in these parallel universes
I see the mirrored versions of myself

trying to find the happy me
it seems she doesn't exist

Your love so empty
I love the way it kills me silently
All I've ever wanted was your love/ warm around me

do you know I'm alive
do you know I'm breathing

do you ever think of me
when you're trying to sleep

have I ever appeared in one of your dreams

You're the echo in my mind
you're the cloud above my head

You're my favorite
I know you don't accept it

I hope you do
When you lay alone

Think of me beside you
gone
I'm not there anymore

I'm who gives you love
Leaves you after a while.
I'm the one
Who sees the little things

I take care of you
You're my favorite

I know you'll never give yourself

I'm no fool

Never see me coming
Giving you joy
I'm your sun
I'm the one who brings the wildflowers to bloom

I'll be there when you need me the most
You're my favorite

All the movies I've watched alone

Your company is gone

These days I feel no warmth
No happiness by someone new

Where are my friends
Are they talking to someone they like better than me
Are they shopping and wasting their parent's money


I miss you
I loved you


All these songs I listen alone
Without anyone to tell

Drive alone
Sleep cold
Eat alone
Showers cold


All of these moments wasted
Without someone
To love